A wise friend once told me that the kids will do as well as you do. You can’t be a good parent if you’re a miserable person. Do what you need to do to stay healthy and sane.


1, 5, 15, 21



Keep stuff on hand for guests. Be ready to be a good host / hostess at any moment.


16-21



Sometimes I think the best way to take care of them is to teach them to take care of others: Littler kids, sick or disabled, those who’ve been left out.


5-7, 1Infant-12



“I don’t know what I think until I write about it.” - Joan Didion


15



Train for a mini-triathlon together as a family this year.


12



Teach car maintenance: Adding air to tires, checking oil, etc.


13-17



Soothe a newborn: Swaddle , shushing noise, swing, side/stomach position, suck on a binkie. Read The Happiest Baby on the Block by Dr. Harvey Karp (or watch the video.) It' a life-saver.


Infant



Most brilliant TED talk I ever saw on living authentically. Step one: decide what you don’t give a f*ck about. Step two: don’t give a f*ck about those things. Always be kind and polite but never be sorry for not giving a $@!#% about stuff you don’t give a $@!#% about.


14, 21



“I beseech you, in the bowels of Christ, think it possible that you may be mistaken.” - Oliver Cromwell ……. Great example of this is the story of Dr. Anthony Fauci with regard to his HIV/$@!#% research and corresponding dealings with the gay community. They started out adversarial but Fauci wasn’t above hearing their concerns and working together. Life-saving drugs got approved as a result. Dr. Fauci is one of my heroes. Huge brain, big heart and tiny ego.


15



No absolute restrictions on food but stress that some foods are “party food.” Chips, for example. (I love potato chips!)


4



Micro-internships. Check out Parker Dewey for ideas.


16, 17, 18



Motivation: Just start. Two minutes. You don’t need to feel good to get going, you need to get going to give yourself a chance to feel good.


16



One of the funny/sensitive things about puberty is that kids can be the same age chronologically while being wildly varied in terms of development. Kid might be 6 feet tall in seventh grade or be a senior in high school and still not shaving. Everyone is self conscious, praying to avoid embarrassment. It’s all just part of growing up. Be kind to yourself and to your equally mortified peers.


11, 12, 13



Go to Montgomery County Fair


5-14



Spend 20 minutes a day watching a show you like in Spanish (or whatever your target language is) with reactionary subtitles. You’ll pick it up in no time!


13, 16, 19



Give book "50 Things Every Young Lady Should Know" by Kay West.


14



Don’t quit your job until you have another job. Suck it up and make the best out of it.


21



Set up a dog agility course in the backyard. Use household items or toys, etc and lots of dog treats for training.


8



I’m cool with “C”s. Do good work but don’t put too much pressure yourself.


14



Make sure you always have Uber gift cards on hand for friends, emergencies or whatever.


15-18



Remember your training and staying calm and kind is how you get through this. It’s all you need to excel. So do your homework, whatever it may be. Show up and have at it. Calm and kind, baby. You got this.


9, 12, 14, 18, 21



For parties, collect cell phones and put them in a basket. "Parent calls only. Enjoy the people here! They're pretty awesome!"


12



Let go of things that aren’t good for you. Anger, fear, prejudice, obsession, grudges, snark, etc.


16, 21



Octavia Butler’s “Parable of the Sower.”


14



When you feel sad, mad, confused or in any way upset, go to a quiet place to catch your breath. If you can sit with it and let it tell you what it wants to tell you, then you become its friend. But if you try to deny the feeling, or numb it, it grows much stronger and it fights you.


9, 13, 19



Your emotional energy is sacred, and there’s nothing wrong with treating it that way. If connection is what you’re looking for, save your emotional energy for those who will cherish it and share their own. - Yung Pueblo from his book “Lighter”


12, 14, 17, 21



You can get into big trouble (with school and the law) even by fake / joke threats of violence (bomb threat, etc.) No jokes or pranks that have anything to do with violence.


11



Remember this blessing. You are whole. You are lacking nothing. There is nothing that you must achieve, accomplish, or earn. There is no station of graduate, or married, or children, or partner, or famous, or 120 pounds, or, you know, 4% body fat. There is nothing that you must earn, attain, or accomplish to prove your worthiness. You will learn and grow and change. That's part of being human. But there is nothing about you, there is nothing about your worth that is different on any day of your life. No matter what, no matter when, you are precious, and you are whole. You are safe. You are sound. You are secure.


10, 14, 18, 21