If you can’t afford to tip the server, you can’t afford to be there.


15



I just want to to know that I didn’t know what the $@!#% I was doing. It’s a miracle you turned out so beautifully! Just know you don’t have to have it all figured out. You’re going to have a wonderful life. xoxo - Mom


21



Be kinder than necessary.


9, 15, 21



Practice “doing without” (or “going without.”). Even young kids can learn the concept. Nobody get everything they want. Sometimes it’s harder than others, but it’s not the end of the world when we have to do without something we want.


4-11



Screw “achievement.” Do things you enjoy, share experiences that expand your capacity for joy and compassion. It doesn’t matter if you’re any good, it just matters that you’re in your groove.


16, 21



On marriage: Your spouse will change. You will change. Some for the better, some parts for the worse. Tastes, plans, health, body shape, education, needs, beliefs... all change throughout our lives. It’s growth. (It’s also decay!) Support each other through both. Encourage each other to be true to yourselves. Don’t sweat the small stuff. Be kind. Pray for each other. Have fun together. Keep learning about each other. Be your partner’s biggest fan.


21



Visit Aunt Janet in Morehead City for Seafood Festival in October


2-99



“There’s a part of me that’s a part of you” said a painter whose name I can’t remember. I don’t think he was talking to anyone in particular, or if he meant we’re all a part of each other. Either way, it’s a beautiful thought.


20



Hand out tulip bulbs (or some sort of bulbs) at my funeral and ask people to plant a few in their yard. But NOT daffodils. I hate daffodils. And lilies, hate ‘em.) So tulips then.


21



Put down your phone and be in the moment. Teach this. Model this.


7



Throw some love at a problem.


12, 15, 21



Philippians 4: 11-13


12



SAT Prep https://www.nytimes.com/2017/04/10/opinion/how-i-learned-to-take-the-sat-like-a-rich-kid.html


16



Take the train to Roanoke.


10



Make a Shutterfly book for each year and give it to them on their birthday.


5-18



change the wifi password often. Hold it hostage until chores are done. Work first, play later.


9-14



Sesame Street has great resources on teaching finances to little ones.


4-5



Remember that whoever you’re grieving would only want the best for you.


20



You always have a choice. Always.


15, 19, 21



Yes, push yourself and see how far / fast / high you can go (physically, academically, etc.) But remember, you have nothing to prove to anyone except yourself.


14, 17, 21



If they like you you’ll know. If they don’t you’ll be confused.


15, 21



Never post a pic to social media that you wouldn't want Grandma to see. NEVER send or ask to receive naked pictures. It's tacky, gross, illegal and not worth it. Even if "everyone does it". It's rude and disrespectful.


11-13, 18



Set up a 529 plan. Virginia has a great plan if you don't want to do too much research https://www.savingforcollege.com/


birth-age 3



None of us should ever have to apologize for being who we are.


10, 14, 21



Open a Bank Account


8-12



The opposite of addiction is connection.


11, 14, 17, 20



Sometimes the only thing you can do is to show up. Be there.


13, 15, 17, 21



Consensual sex requires no persuasion, convincing or begging.


14, 17



Letting go hurts. There's no two ways about it. You just gotta feel it and get through it. Cry. Sweat it out. Sing, run, write, or just scrub floors. You will get through it, and you will be stronger and more compassionate.


14