Learn about current trends in social media. Figure out where you draw boundaries, what platforms are allowed and not. Teach them how to stay safe, be positive and kind and always respectful.


9



Teach them about Oliver Cromwell’s rule: “I beseech you, in the bowels of Christ, think it possible that you may be mistaken.” Leave room for your mind to be changed by new evidence or perspective.


14



“Your warmth can be an invitation that unlocks their own.” - Elizabeth Lesser. I love this quote because it’s so true that when you’re kind and genuine, people respond. They take it as a signal that you are a safe place for them to express themselves, which will enable a true connection to be formed. You both win when that happens.


15, 21



Purpose is more important than happiness. Having a purpose (or looking for it) will save you. (And sometimes finding a *new* purpose is what you need.)


16, 21



Talk about what patterns of abuse look like. Teach them to recognize red flags like love-bombing, isolating from friends and family, controlling behavior and threats of violence and/or self-harm.


14, 16, 20, 21



One of the most important things I can teach you is to help you learn how to deal with big feelings without resorting to destructive behavior or violence. Everyone on the planet will experience loss, disappointment, grief, heartbreak, betrayal, etc. Tools to deal with these feelings: counseling, journaling, art, music, exercise, meditation, breathing exercises, yoga, being in nature, talking with friends, joining a support group, movement like dancing or skating, singing, acting, anthropomorphic dialogue with your emotions, naming your emotions and describe how they physically feel in your body. Asking the emotion what it needs you to know.


1Infant-20



Practice being embarrassed. Tell embarrassing stories. Help them learn how to deal with the sensation.


9



Think about God as the driver of our car or the pilot of a plane- He gets us through the storm, he shows us and encourages us to enjoy the beauty of the scenery. But all the while He keeps us with him. He doesn’t cause the storms, He gets us through them. We can trust in his goodness and wisdom even when the conditions are really scary.


5, 12



People pretend to enjoy all sorts of things. Don’t assume you’re the only one who thinks drinking to the point of getting sick is just stupid.


15



Don’t take criticism from people you wouldn’t take advice from.


16



Your very existence is a miracle. Countless cosmic events and generations of ancestors had to come together in precisely the right way at precisely the right time for you to be here now. It’s an honor to be who you are. Act accordingly.


13, 15, 18, 20, 21



change the wifi password often. Hold it hostage until chores are done. Work first, play later.


9-14



Kitchen Commandment: She who cooks the dinner shall not clean up from dinner. I don't want to raise any of you to take housework for granted. It's hard. It's unfair and not cool to expect anyone (parent, spouse, roommate, etc. )to wait on you.


7-18



I like to say a Hail Mary just to join the chorus, to add my voice to the millions who are praying in that moment. The world has plenty of people thinking or doing horrible things, we need to add to the good, add to the beauty as much as possible at every turn. Saying a quick prayer is sometimes all I can muster.


9-19



I hope you become more of yourself with every passing year. I love you so.


21



When I say I want you to be happy I’m not talking about pleasure and ease. I mean purpose and pride you in yourself, meaningful work, and a solid group of friends and family who loves you for who you are, so you don’t ever have to pretend to be something you’re not.


21



“Never be sorry for not knowing


17, 21



Name a few male celebrities you would feel safe with alone in a room. Keanu Reeves, Jack Black, Barack Obama, to start us off.


11, 13, 15



Build a treehouse together


8



Resist the urge to blurt out and over share when you’re feeling pressured to say something. Have a few “go to” phrases in your back pocket. “I’m at a lack of words” or “vibe check” or “let’s take a beat.” Come up with your own. Calm, kind, respectful. xoxo


11, 12, 14, 17, 21



Commonly misspelled words - find tricks for remembering. Example desert vs dessert. “Dessert” has an extra “s” for sugar. Search for mnemonics.


11



Work the problem backwards. Start with the solution (desired outcome) and count down from there each step. Some steps will be small, some big. But you’ll get there!


13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18



Enrich your mind. Refresh your body. Renew your spirit. - Andrew Weil, MD.


13, 16, 19, 21



Recipe for happiness that stands the test of time: Be who you are, and figure out how you are uniquely equipped to serve.


15, 21



Don’t worry if they’re not listening to what you say...They watch what you do. They study it.


13



Teach car maintenance: Adding air to tires, checking oil, etc.


13-17



Rudeness is a weak person’s imitation of strength.


13, 21



Marriage tip: King sized blanket on Queen size bed.


21



You don’t have to have everything you want. Practice saying “no thank you” to dessert or passing on the purchase you’re considering. Benefits are plentiful: Build self-discipline (which is like a muscle) and you learn you’re really ok and often happier when you don’t indulge a “want.”


13, 15, 21



Ask him to memorize and recite William Ernest Henley poem “Invictus” as a Christmas present for me.


15