If you’re unable to help someone, help someone else. Throw some goodness or beauty in the bucket of humanity.


16



It’s okay to take a beat, a pause before you answer: “Hold on, let me think about how this is going to work...” I’ve seen a lot of mistakes or loss of confidence in an employee because they just blurted out a guess or starting off in the wrong direction only to have to go back- just because the plan hadn’t been thought through. It only takes a minute.


15, 18, 20



If you’re easily offended you are easily manipulated. So take a breath and turn off your ego.


14, 19, 21



When you’re getting serious in a relationship here’s something to consider- To what extent is your partner is willing to put others’ needs before their own?


21



Institute “Family Night” a screen-free night of games and fun and togetherness. Can use these times for conversations about things you want to address / teach. Maybe make theme nights and build around a lesson so it’s fun and enjoyable. Continue through school years.


4-6



Ask smart questions. More importantly, ask stupid questions! So many people are afraid of looking stupid that they totally fake understanding. Even in the very highest levels of career and society. Ask basic questions if something doesn’t make sense. Start at a kindergarten level understanding of a concept then build on it.


15, 20



A mommy-friend of mine gave me some good advice: "Count the wins." So what if you didn't clean the house, you showered! So what if she's wearing 9 different colors - she dressed herself! Great advice. So remember, especially on the difficult days - and there will be many: Count the wins.


1



Long before I was old enough to decide what I wanted my life to be about, I was set on a path of other’s choosing: marriage, kids, Catholic. I took that assignment to heart. Focused like a laser beam. Ironically, I believe that it’s because marriage and a conventional family was my prime directive that I ended up becoming roadkill on that path. My point is twofold: don’t let me or anyone else tell you what your life should look like. Maybe college isn’t for you, maybe marriage isn’t something that appeals to you, maybe it is! Keep exploring until you find a direction that fits your own values and priorities. As long as you’re paying your bills and you’re not hurting anyone including yourself, knock yourself out! Go wild! Do whatever feels right. And if you don’t know where you want to be, go where you’re needed to start with. I love you forever no matter what you do.


17, 21



Today is not the day to lose your sh*t. Deep breaths, cold water, do your hair. You’re gonna be just fine.


1-21



If you don’t know where to begin, picture where you want it to end, and work it backwards.


15, 21



Throw some love at a problem.


12, 15, 21



Encourage creativity, science and engineering: Make a craft station / work bench for projects. Fill it with all kinds of art supplies, engineering kits, tools, pegboard, etc. Stock safety equipment like goggles and make sure the area has good lighting. Lots of ideas on Pinterest, etc.


8



Listen to books of love letters. I forget the title but one of the Bush twins wrote a book about her grandparents (George and Barbara). Stories about real love, real life. Fiction is great too but having a real world examples of happy partnerships is gold.


18



“You have to meet people where they are. Sometimes, you have to leave them there.” -Iyanla Vanzant


21



When you begin dating it’s all butterflies and moonbeams. Eventually you’re going to do or say something that hurts the other person and vice versa. For that matter, eventually you’ll disagree about something. It’s VERY important to consider how they handle it. Nobody is perfect, it may not be pretty but it had better be civil. If not, don’t think for a second that they will change. Get outta there.


15, 21



Every time your heart breaks, your vision gets better. You appreciate beauty and recognize and respond to others’ pain better.


12, 15, 18, 21



Read “Attack of the Black Rectangles” by Amy Sarid King.


12



Keep your pants on until you (and your partner) are at least 18. Keep your pants on if you or your partner are drunk. Keep your pants on if you or your partner are not 100% enthusiastic about going farther.


15



Change always brings feelings of unease. It’s easy to confuse that feeling of unease with the feeling that something must be wrong. Give yourself time to adjust before deciding if a new thing is bad..


14, 18, 21



Read A Mother’s Reckoning by Sue Klebold (mother of Columbine shooter.)


12



We feel best when we create. No amount of food, video games or any self-destructive habits will fill that hole. So why fight it?!? Create something, even if it’s as small as a little sketch or poem. Grow a garden, bake a cake. Start a business! Whatever your beautiful heart desires.


12, 15, 18, 21



Check out from the library or Amazon: “My First Money Book: A Guide for Parents and Children to Saving, Spending, Sharing, and Investing Your Money” by Reggie Nelson


8



Mindset for a breakup: “I’d rather adjust to your absence than be continually frustrated by your presence.” Can work with romantic partners, jobs, habits...anything you’re hanging on to that you know you should let go of.


19



They’re not rejecting you, they’re just becoming who they are. Give them some space.


12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17



Two instances when exercise is unhealthy: when you’re only doing it because you want to lose weight or because you’re terrified you will gain weight.


14, 18, 21



"The idea that some lives matter less is the root of all that is wrong with the world." - Paul Farmer


15, 21



If you ever borrow someone’s car, return it with a full tank of gas.


20



Alka-Seltzer is great for a hangover or even better, take it before you go to bed after partying. Disclaimer I’m talking about a few drinks. For the love of everything holy, please don’t ingest insane amounts of alcohol at a time. Buzzed is fun, drunk is stupid. And dangerous. Never drive once you’ve had a drink or weed.


18



Be the kind of man that people feel safe around. Safe from harm, safe from judgment and safe from ridicule.


17



Grit.


14