Let them borrow your calm. Little ones (grownups too) sometimes just need to freak out a bit. Stay there. Be near. Don’t judge or even help. Just be there, and stay calm. Your loving energy is all they need as they work through it themselves. Keep them safe but other than that don’t help or advise unless they ask.


2-6, 17, 21



Girls: does he put in the effort even when it’s inconvenient or uncomfortable for him?


16, 20, 21



YouTube Hank Green “Study Hall.” It talks about navigating the mess of college and career choices, like choosing a major (and what a major is!) What interests align with which majors, etc.


12, 15, 16



Help them develop a positive attitude. http://www.momentsaday.com/10-activities-help-young-children-develop-a-positive-attitude/


5



Things are rarely black and white. Most situations (and all people) are complex. A nuanced approach is necessary to understand them. You can’t learn - or love, if you’re judging.


17



The opposite of addiction is connection.


11, 14, 17, 20



When you know better, do better. No one is born a fully actualized human being! We are all in the process of becoming who we wish to be.


16, 21



Awesome game we did at preschool - play I SPY. Try with objects or emotions, such as "I spy something sad" or "I spy something joyful." To help him learn empathy.


3-5



Once a relationship goes from loving someone as they are to trying to change them into something you want them to be, it’s doomed. We can challenge, inspire and educate those we love, but in the end we have to accept them as they are and embrace them warts and all. (They’re doing the same for us.)


18



When you begin dating it’s all butterflies and moonbeams. Eventually you’re going to do or say something that hurts the other person and vice versa. For that matter, eventually you’ll disagree about something. It’s VERY important to consider how they handle it. Nobody is perfect, it may not be pretty but it had better be civil. If not, don’t think for a second that they will change. Get outta there.


15, 21



Practice road-rage roll playing. People are NUTS! It's hard to imagine how you'll react when someone gets aggressive with you. Let's practice staying calm when someone is shouting and in your face.


15-17



Consent is more than the literal


13, 14, 15, 16, 21



Teach to use nail clippers


7



In the wise words of Taylor Swift, you don’t have to forgive or forget in order to move on. You can just…move on.


15, 21



I’m not a tattoo person but I don’t rule it out entirely. Here’s my opinion about tattoos: I’m cool with anything you would do if you were the only person on earth. Not to gain attention, acceptance or affection. Not for the approval of anyone else. No performative tattoos, okay?


16, 17, 18, 21



Quoting Glennon Doyle: “Things can feel hard and sad and still be exactly right, all at the same time.” She’s referring to her divorce but the sentiment applies to all kinds of tough choices that we all make. Very few choices feel 100% right.


17



Never resist a generous impulse.


9, 12, 19



Consider what you value. Act accordingly.


10, 14, 17, 20



Read “Attack of the Black Rectangles” by Amy Sarid King.


12



Adjust your expectations but never lower your standards.


12, 15, 18, 21



Don’t take criticism from people you wouldn’t take advice from.


16



Universal Studios


12-18



Read The Invisible Boy by Trudy Ludwig.


4



Never trust your tongue when your heart is bitter. Hush until you heal.


12, 18



Ask them to think of foods that taste good and also foods that make them feel good. Involve them in lunchbox decisions, dinner planning and prep, etc. so they’re empowered by their food habits.


6-9



Unkind people are unhappy people.


8, 18



Appalachian Mountain Club


9-13



Go to movie Star Wars


12



Make a Shutterfly book for each year and give it to them on their birthday.


5-18



The "work" in "relationships take work" should be like the "work" it takes to go to the beach. “Sure, you gotta pack food, beverages, drive there, park, and set up... But you get to the beach


18, 21