Don’t ask for anything until you’ve done what has been asked of you.


5



Grandpa used to keep a hundred dollar bill stashed discreetly in his wallet “for emergencies.”


17



Remember your training and staying calm and kind is how you get through this. It’s all you need to excel. So do your homework, whatever it may be. Show up and have at it. Calm and kind, baby. You got this.


9, 12, 14, 18, 21



“But what is grief if not love preserving?” - Unknown


18



Remember when you’re faced with bullies, jerks and people who say bad things , follow advice from the Obama's: "When they go low we go high."


1Infant-14



Listen to The Moth (storytelling) together.


15



Let’s talk about how we can bless people - with what we have and by how we act.


7



There is an expression “God only gives you what you can handle.” I think that’s backwards. I think that God gives you the grace you need to handle whatever comes your way. He is faithful and generous. I think that’s what “Be not afraid” means.


17



A lesson from author Tom Zumba. I hope you’ll never need it: “There is nothing nothing easy about this thing called grief. Nothing. But I ask you to please please please say yes more often than you say no. Say yes to you. To possibility. To hope. To love. To life. To healing. Please choose the light more often than you choose the darkness. Not that there aren't gifts in the darkness. There are. But it's often so much easier to find them the gifts in the light. Do all you can to stay in the light. Please remember that the person you love so so so dearly lived. Don't forget that. He lived. She lived. Here with you. And your relationship continues. Always. Don't be so overwhelmed and paralyzed and pissed off that he died that she died that you spend most of your time focusing on their death. Focus on your life. Together. Say yes as often as you can. Choose light as often as you can. Remember that he lived as often as you can. Don't lose her in the details of her death. This thing called grief is hard hard hard work. But you are stronger than you think. His book is called Permission to Mourn


21



Give him a copy of The Secret Lives of Great Composers by Elizabeth Lunday.


14



If you want to know what girls like, read the books they’re reading, watch the shows they watch, etc. Porn is entertainment *not* education. Movies books and shows marketed to 12 year-old boys get it wrong most of the time, can’t learn anything from them. Chick flicks is where you’ll find a little instruction on how to flirt in a non-creepy way, how to kiss, how to be in a healthy relationship. Study the difference between the male gaze vs female gaze.


14



Check in on your friends. Even the ones that seem fine.


14-21



Set up a dog agility course in the backyard. Use household items or toys, etc and lots of dog treats for training.


8



Practice making yourself do something you don’t feel like doing. Practice and it gets easier


10, 12, 15, 18, 21



Monty Python movies.


12-15



“Bullies are scared people hiding inside scary people.” -Michelle Obama


8-12



None of us should ever have to apologize for being who we are.


10, 14, 21



My favorite actor was Robin Williams.


19



Just let a sweet moment be. There’s a time for jokes or small talk, but sometimes silence is best.


15,21



Find what you love Do what you love Be what you love Live what you love Love what you love and never look back ... Except to love.


19



Puberty is like putting a 12 year old in the pilot seat of a fighter jet. A total sh*t show at first, then better but still erratic and dramatic until they really get a feel for the speed and the pressure, the gauges, etc. They’ll learn when to question or to trust their instincts. Tell him that he’ll fly this jet for the rest of his life and it will always be dangerous because it’s an effing jet, but he will learn how to fly it expertly. He’ll do good, have fun, accomplish missions and refuel.


12



The thing about behavior is that if you practice you get better. That goes for good behavior and bad behavior. The more you lie, cheat, etc. the better u get. Decide What kind of behavior you want to be good at and then practice practice


7



Compassion: Acting with love when faced with another’s suffering.


16



Check out Travel for Teens for summer travel programs. Let them choose from themes like service, adventure, animal rescue, etc.


14



“You will encounter many defeats, but you must not be defeated.” -Maya Angelou


17



Go as a family to local high school musical productions.


7-18



Any thought about self-harm is like a “check engine” light going off for your brain. Seek professional help. You will recover.


12, 14, 15, 17, 19, 21



“If you can’t figure something out, figure out how to figure it out.” - Paul Graham


18



Do something that feeds your soul every day. Experience or create joy, even if just a small spark of it.


17