Resist the urge to blurt out and over share when you’re feeling pressured to say something. Have a few “go to” phrases in your back pocket. “I’m at a lack of words” or “vibe check” or “let’s take a beat.” Come up with your own. Calm, kind, respectful. xoxo
11, 12, 14, 17, 21
It's a skill to learn how to love people the way they need to be loved. I highly recommend reading the Five Love Languages.
18, 21
Someone I admire is __________. Talk about someone you admire and why. Ask them to do the same. Do this often as you can. Reticket through age 18.
4
I just want to to know that I didn’t know what the $@!#% I was doing. It’s a miracle you turned out so beautifully! Just know you don’t have to have it all figured out. You’re going to have a wonderful life. xoxo - Mom
21
I’m parenting as in most things, staying calm is more than half the battle. Practice keeping your cool in all situations. No yelling blaming freaking out or meanness. Calm rules the day.
1, 21
“When it comes to consequences, don’t speak what you won’t serve.” Meaning don’t threaten any punishment you’re not willing to enforce. This is helpful in terms of teaching the child a lesson and also an important lesson in not shooting yourself in the foot. (I took away your tv one day you were home on a snow day. Bad idea. That punishment was against my own interest! I got no work done.
2
Google Taylor Swift contrast Kim Kardashion at 2024 Superbowl. Good vibes are always better than “cool.” Show up. Dog park energy. Forget trying to look cool.
15, 17, 18, 21
Try using “No doesn’t tell me your needs” when toddler / little kid disobeys. “Were you trying to be funny? Do you need a minute?”
3
“Natural” deodorant doesn’t work. Go with trusted brands here. There are times when it’s fine not to look your best, but stinky is never okay.
13, 18
Today is not the day to lose your sh*t. Deep breaths, cold water, do your hair. You’re gonna be just fine.
1-21
Talk about how choices become habits. Habits can become addictions. Describe how pathways are literally dug into the brain and it's very hard to change them once those paths are made.
13-16
It’s not a project, it’s a practice. (Health, fitness, keeping up with current events, prayer or meditation, housework, reading, etc.)
16
Trust me when I tell you that one day you’ll look back and realize you judged people unfairly and you held strong to convictions only to end up changing your mind about in the light of life experience. Leave a little space open for second impressions or the possibility that you could be wrong.
17
Our nervous systems are just trying to keep us safe. If you were thrown into fight/flight/fawn today, give yourself some grace.
14, 21