Sometimes, no matter how great a thing is it can’t make up for what it’s not.


14, 19, 21



Get up early on a Saturday and go downtown. See how fun it is to be up before the rest of the world.


7-9



I just want to to know that I didn’t know what the $@!#% I was doing. It’s a miracle you turned out so beautifully! Just know you don’t have to have it all figured out. You’re going to have a wonderful life. xoxo - Mom


21



Don’t be a mooch! Contribute: To your home, your relationships, your work, your community, your church, your country, the world. Think about how much you get from all these things. It’s so much more from all these things than you could ever pay back, but that doesn’t mean you don’t try. Dig in and contribute wherever you can. Never free-load. That’s not who we are. Be brave and contribute your talent, treasure or whatever you can. Duty and compassion both demand it.


11-18



Don’t quit your job until you have another job. Suck it up and make the best out of it.


21



I’ve been trying to retrain my brain to deal with anxiety in healthy ways. It’s SO hard when these connections were fused decades ago. BUT I REFUSE to be a party to YOU laying down those same unhealthy neurological pathways. I’ll teach you better ways to handle stress and anxiety. Exercise/ Music/ warm showers/ creativity/ rest/ journaling/ meditation... WHATEVER! I promise to Somehow teach you what I never learned.


5-10, 14



Life is like the ocean: Filled with energy, beauty, scary schit, lots of interesting creatures and so much to be in awe of. We couldn’t possibly control it but we can be a part of it.


16



Which line of poetry would you get tattooed?


17



Born To Dance has lessons and also does birthday parties. A dance class is a good way to get up and out of the house on Saturday mornings during the winter months. It'll be fun at this age - while he's still young enough to enjoy it without being self-conscious. Also a good way to get exercise before he's ready for organized sports.


4-5



Check into Brilliant.org for STEM activities.


12



“For better or worse means no matter what life throws at us, not no matter what you do to me.” - Brenda Linn


19, 21



Talk to people like they belong and are valued exactly as they are in that moment.


12-14, 21



“Parents detect fake friends. Kids detect fake relatives and friends detect fake love.” - I forget who’s grandma said it.


14



Putting up the Christmas tree the weekend or next after Thanksgiving, then watching Polar Express in the glow of the lights. Maybe the smell of gingerbread cookies baking too.


5-9



Long before I was old enough to decide what I wanted my life to be about, I was set on a path of other’s choosing: marriage, kids, Catholic. I took that assignment to heart. Focused like a laser beam. Ironically, I believe that it’s because marriage and a conventional family was my prime directive that I ended up becoming roadkill on that path. My point is twofold: don’t let me or anyone else tell you what your life should look like. Maybe college isn’t for you, maybe marriage isn’t something that appeals to you, maybe it is! Keep exploring until you find a direction that fits your own values and priorities. As long as you’re paying your bills and you’re not hurting anyone including yourself, knock yourself out! Go wild! Do whatever feels right. And if you don’t know where you want to be, go where you’re needed to start with. I love you forever no matter what you do.


17, 21



Most people are good. Some are bad. Many are crazy.


15, 21



Have a charity lemonade stand. Pediatric cancer research, immigrant children, etc. Lots of problems...Let them be involved in part of the solution.


7-10



Replace “but” with “and.” “I love you but...” Becomes “I love you and that’s why...” etc.


9



Approach difficult conversations looking to learn something, not to prove something.


16, 21



“If you want to be holy, be kind”. -Frederick Buechner


14, 19, 21



Toddler not interested in food? Hand them a random kitchen gadget to play with while you’re feeding them dinner, they’ll eat more if distracted.


1,2



You can (and should) pray for help. But remember, you have to do your part too. Depending on the situation it could be a little or a lot, but don’t just sit back and expect to be rescued. Moses had to dip his toe in the Red Sea before God parted it. Ask for help, but do your part.


14, 21



Teach to use nail clippers


7



You are not your thoughts. Focus more on your choices / actions.


17



Be mindful of privilege. Discuss the concept, point it out where you see it.


11-18



You’ll be finished with school soon. The most important thing I hope you learned is that there is still so much yet to learn.


21



Take the train to Roanoke.


10



Say it early and repeat it often, so that it sinks way down deep: There is nothing you could do to make me stop loving you. No mistake, no failure, no decision, nothing. There is no hole so deep that if you fell into it I wouldn’t climb down to help you out of. I love you no matter what.


7



If you see a kid sitting alone, he or she might be your next best friend. Go say hi! Ask him/her to sit next to you / play on your team, etc. No need to worry about whether that person is “too cool” or “not cool enough,” they’re just a kid. Like you.


8



Addiction is when you can’t get through the day without something. It’s not that you need to feel high, it’s that you can’t live without what gets you high. Humans are all wired to be at risk for addiction


13, 15, 18, 20