Put a few drops of tea tree oil in their shampoo bottle to keep lice at bay. If there’s a outbreak at school, add more. (Or spritz their hair with a tea tree oil solution.)


5-7



I want to talk about when NOT to join in. Friends are great and feeling like we belong feels so good. But there are times I hope you muster the courage not to go along: Never cause anyone or anything pain in order to be liked. Don't confuse cruelty for humor. Never participate in things that may cause harm to yourself or others. Can you think of some things you want to make sure you don't go along with?


11



Institute a “Wall of Fame” for accomplishments and victories, big and small. AND a “Wall of Shame” for minor infractions such as not changing the toilet paper roll, etc. We have to be willing to put ourselves on the wall of shame too - and that’s the lesson: We all make mistakes but we own up to them, fix them if possible and learn from them always. Also good fun. Start our with actual paper version but transition to a shared iCloud album to post wall of shame pics once they are old enough for phones. Maybe even continue through adulthood if they “shame” themselves!


5-15, 18, 21



I highly recommend you read The Crane Wife by CJ Houser.


15, 17, 19, 21



Read “Lighter” by Yung Pueblo. Read it every year.


17, 19, 21



When they confide in you or tell you something that makes them so vulnerable u don’t know what to tell them, just sat “I’m so glad you told me.” (You’re not alone, I heard you, I’m here and will stay with you until it’s resolved.) re-ticket yearly.


9



"Love is nothing more and nothing less than relentlessly showing up for your people." - Glennon Doyle


18-21



“First things first!” It’s a constant struggle to get out of the house or complete a task. Hammer home “first things first!” After they’re dressed (or whatever task) THEN they can have screen time or playtime free-time, etc.


4



In professional setting: Limit one exclamation point per email, if any. Definitely no emoticons.


19



Ask “What are you going to teach ME?” Let him work on something to teach.


11



Kids (and people of all ages) need attention, affection and appreciation. It’s not all they need, but it’s a start!


11



Put your purse, (wallet,bag, phone, or shoe) in the backseat with the baby. Unattended babies die every day and it’s my worst nightmare.


Infant-3, 21



Having an opinion is not the same thing as having an informed opinion. If you don't know enough about a subject to speak intelligently about it, keep quiet and educate yourself.


12, 18



The mind replays what the heart wants to heal.


16



You don’t have to lower your standards, just lower your walls.


12, 15, 21



Your life is way bigger than one relationship. Or one grade, or one job, or one choice, or one event, or one gift. Make room for all of it even when some of it will most certainly hurt.


17



Let your toddler brush your teeth. Goes a long way to them letting you brush theirs and it gives them a sense of autonomy and control.


2,3,4



Toast your wife at every occasion.


21



Crushes are fine but I beg you not to waste your time and energy obsessing about someone. Really it’s just a way to hide, to feel something without risking anything. F that. Turn your attention to something creative, constructive or productive. Make art, train for a race, volunteer or get a second job. Discover WHAT you love. Pursue that and your people will be there.


15, 17, 20, 21



Stay fit. Try to increase fitness every year in some way: Strength, flexibility, endurance, or a specific sport or practice. Never take your body for granted.


14, 20



Never open someone else's mail, or listen to their conversation, etc. If it's not your business to know, don't snoop.


14-21



My mom did laundry twice a week: Tuesdays and Saturdays. She separated colors! It never piled up and we all had clean clothes. I do laundry daily, it's never done and we can't find what we need. Ask Grandma what was her secret to the science of laundry. Because it's now your job to do all your own laundry!


14



Appreciate other cultures when traveling or interacting among people from different cultures. Once on a mission trip, the locals brought coffee and cookies by in the afternoons, but I never took any. I regret that lost opportunity for connection.


14, 18, 21



"God came to us because he wanted to join us on the road, to listen to our story, and to help us realize that we are not walking in circles but moving towards the house of peace and joy. This is the great mystery of Christmas that continues to give us comfort and consolation: we are not alone on our journey. The God of love who gave us life sent his only Son to be with us at all times and in all places, so that we never have to feel lost in our struggles but always can trust that he walks with us. The challenge is to let God be who he wants to be. A part of us clings to our aloneness and does not allow God to touch us where we are most in pain. Often we hide from him precisely those places in ourselves where we feel guilty, ashamed, confused, and lost. Thus we do not give him a chance to be with us where we feel most alone. Christmas is the renewed invitation not to be afraid and to let him-whose love is greater than our own hearts and minds can comprehend-be our companion" - Henri Nouwen


16, 21



Never say anything behind someone's back that you wouldn't say to their face.


11, 14, 18



Shampoo their hair. Nice luxurious shampoo. It’s a treat. In “5 Love Languages” speak, its an act of service and physical touch.


5, 7, 9, 12



“Tell me the story of your day.” (Works better than “how was your day?”


5, 6, 10



What’s the Mark Twain quote about it’s not what you don’t know that gets you into trouble it’s what you know for sure that just ain’t true.


13, 21



Book “Rainbow Relatives” is a great resource to be able to kindly, accurately and sensitively answer their questions about LGBTQ families.


6



We don’t snoop. Never read a correspondence (email, letter, text, note, etc.) that is not intended for your eyes, or listen in to a conversation that is not intended for your ears. The right to privacy is sacred. Always respect people’s privacy and set the expectation that others do the same for you.


10