Your life is way bigger than one relationship. Or one grade, or one job, or one choice, or one event, or one gift. Make room for all of it even when some of it will most certainly hurt.
17
Check out Travel for Teens for summer travel programs. Let them choose from themes like service, adventure, animal rescue, etc.
14
Other peoples’ expectations are the guard rails on the road. They keep you safe and guide you he way - literally. They keep you from driving off a cliff. So if you want to be safe, and if you do that’s great, stay within the guardrails. But if you want to fly, you’re gonna have to run right over them.
18, 21
Toddlers fall... a lot. Most falls are harmless but sometimes bad accidents happen. Head injuries are scary because they bleed and swell. If bleeding doesn't stop within a few minutes or you can see it's a big gash, head to the urgent care. And remember if the swelling goes out (“goose egg”) that’s a good thing: Better out than in.
2
Great reminders for how to deal with belligerent kids. https://mailchi.mp/ahaparenting/8-things-you-can-do-when-your-child-is-belligerent
4
“ It was my high school drama teacher who made sure I knew there was space for me in this world. Her kind words had a tremendous impact on my life. If you don’t know where to begin, start with “I see you. I love you. I’m so happy you’re here.” -Chasten Buttigieg
12
Questions 1. How did you fail today? 2. What did you learn? 3. What do you love about yourself? 4. Name something you’re grateful for. 5. How are you in service to others? 6. Did you feel God’s presence today? 7. Are you happy in your heart? 8. What is something that scares you? 9. What do you need to feel safe and supported? 10. What’s something you like doing that makes your heart happy?
7, 8, 9, 15
Some days it feels like your world is falling apart, but what's really happening is that it's falling into place. Make good choices. Be kind. Be brave. Trust.
15, 21
That trope “everything happens for a reason” is, I think, b.s. But I absolutely agree that you can find meaning in anything good or bad.
17
At the start of a day / project / interview / date / etc. Do this one simple thing: State your intention. How do you want to carry yourself? What is the goal for the outcome? Just take a moment to imagine how you want to behave, react, appear, etc. What impression do you want to leave with the people you interact with? Of those things that are in your control, what outcome would make you proud?
15, 20
You gotta play with them. Down on the floor, at the park, in the water, in the snow. Connect through play, it will be the foundation of your relationship.
1-4
There’s one thing I’ve noticed that makes the difference between an adult and someone who is over 18: That person’s proclivity for reading. Books make you smarter, yes but they also make you kinder, funnier, more empathetic and more tolerant of opposing viewpoints. Travel has a similar effect but is a lot more expensive! If you want to be a genuine grownup, read (or listen to) everything you can get your hands on.
10, 14, 16, 20
Listen to books of love letters. I forget the title but one of the Bush twins wrote a book about her grandparents (George and Barbara). Stories about real love, real life. Fiction is great too but having a real world examples of happy partnerships is gold.
18
make your own latch board / "busy board" for plenty of hours of learning and entertainment. Find lots of great ideas on Pinterest.
1-2
Never tolerate abuse. But definitely learn how to throw annoying habits and stupid drama in the bucket of the 10% of things you don’t like about being in the relationship. Even the most beautiful stallions poo, everything produces waste. Clean the waste, deal with it as a constant byproduct of life. don’t $@!#% the horse so you don’t have to deal with poo.
17, 21
Sit down together and write house rules on anger. We don’t hit or bite. Do we yell and slam doors? Name-call? Say “I don’t love you” ? Bad words? What’s appropriate anger and what’s unacceptable?
4-6
Great career advice from tv producer Tara Schuster: Be the best at the worst job. You’re a lowly intern, you’re not gonna get asked to sit down with the boss and strategize. But say the boss likes coffee, and the office coffee machine is unreliable. Fix the machine. Keep it in tip-top condition. Make a contribution to the company in small ways, consistent with your level of ability (which at this age is low low low. NO ONE likes a 20-something who thinks he/ she knows it all. Or knows anything really.) Listen, learn, anticipate needs and surpass expectations doing the little things. Be polite, kind, ethical. Be on time (early.) Yes, compete but also help others look good and succeed. NEVER never trash-talk a colleague, client, boss or subordinate. Don’t suck-up either. Mostly just listen, work, make yourself useful wherever you can. And have fun. You’re gonna do great, bunny.
18, 20
It is my daily mood that makes the weather. I possess tremendous power to make life miserable or joyous. I can be a tool of torture or an instrument of inspiration, I can humiliate or humor, hurt or heal. ____ In all situations, it is my response that decides whether a crisis is escalated or de-escalated, and a person is humanized or de-humanized. ____ If we treat people as they are, we make them worse. If we treat people as they ought to be, we help them become what they are capable of becoming.” — Haim G. Ginott, Teacher and Child: A Book for Parents and Teachers (Re-ticket this every year.)
6
Difficult conversations are…difficult. If you have to deliver bad news, don’t beat around the bush but prepare them for what’s coming rather than just blurting it out. “I have some news that’s going to be difficult to hear…” Or “Is this a good time to talk?” Those are just a couple examples, but many more are available. Look it up or ask people who routinely have to give bad news.
20
Start the tradition of First Sunday dinners. On the first Sunday of the month, have a "mini-holiday" dinner. Invite family, friends. Use the nice dishes, make a big meal. Celebrate family.
4-18
Get book “Talk to Me First: Everything You Need to Know to Become Your Kids'Go-To Person about Sex.” by Deborah Roffman.
7