I like to say a Hail Mary just to join the chorus, to add my voice to the millions who are praying in that moment. The world has plenty of people thinking or doing horrible things, we need to add to the good, add to the beauty as much as possible at every turn. Saying a quick prayer is sometimes all I can muster.


9-19



It’s very easy to wander into trouble- not usually easy to wander out of it.


12



Stay away from anything or anyone that denies or disparages a person’s humanity. (Or a group’s humanity.)


12-21



"The only way to work through sh*tty feelings is to walk through sh*tty feelings." - Psychologist Kristen Howe Hard lesson, but big truth.


15



Your body and brain are always trying to protect you.


17



Read The Lion, The Witch and the Wardrobe together.


8



Always remember - cheesecake is the best cake.


21



"You think your pain and your heartbreak are unprecedented in the history of the world, but then you read." ~ James Baldwin


14, 19



I once asked my mom if my grandmother (her mother in law) was rich. Her reply: “No, but she likes to think she is.” I think she meant my grandmother spent money like she had plenty of it when she really did not. Can relate. I hope you do better!


14, 21



It’s not fair to resent someone for being exactly who they are.


17, 21



“When it comes to consequences, don’t speak what you won’t serve.” Meaning don’t threaten any punishment you’re not willing to enforce. This is helpful in terms of teaching the child a lesson and also an important lesson in not shooting yourself in the foot. (I took away your tv one day you were home on a snow day. Bad idea. That punishment was against my own interest! I got no work done.


2



Learn to recognize invitations from the Lord - invitations to look at beauty. Invitations for compassion, for learning and for love.


9-15



Never post a pic to social media that you wouldn't want Grandma to see. NEVER send or ask to receive naked pictures. It's tacky, gross, illegal and not worth it. Even if "everyone does it". It's rude and disrespectful.


11-13, 18



“Distraction is the death of art. But boredom is the birth place of it.” (Forgot who said this)


12, 15, 21



Look into YMCA “family camp” in PA.


7



A dear friend of the family used to swear by the many healing properties of Seabreeze (alcohol based astringent.) She’d prescribe it for everything from sunburn to bug bites, rashes and scrapes. it stung like heck but she was right: The stuff is a miracle! I always keep a bottle Seabreeze around and think of Mimi every time I use it.


18



Look into going to college abroad. Research international universities. Spain, Netherlands, etc.


15, 16



Kindness + Confidence = secret to success and “popularity.”


10, 12, 13, 14, 15, 17, 18, 21



Be mindful of the patterns we’re falling into as a family. Teach them to be mindful of their patterns too.


6, 8, 12, 18



Marry your hero.


21



Worst thing in the world is spending your life with the wrong person.


21



Plan trip to Outside Lands music festival at Golden Gate Park


17



You are always responsible for how you act, no matter what you’re feeling. (Or whether you’re drunk or in any way impaired.) Hammer this point home for the next 10 years!


13



Meditation isn’t about a quiet mind, it’s about training a distracted mind to remain in the present. Focus on your breathing for one minute (set a timer.) Every time your thoughts wonder, gently bring your focus back to your breath. You may have to do this 10, 20, 30 or more times during those 60 seconds…but eventually you’ll get better. When you do, increase to two minutes, then five, all the way up to 30 minutes or even an hour.


16



Depression can look a lot like a bad attitude. Try reacting to his chronic edginess with “Sounds like you’re in pain. You can come to me about anything, any time.”


15



“ A vocation is where our anger and our joy meet.” -Sarah Bessey


16



Let people do what they want to do so you can see what they’d rather do.


16



“Tell me something you want to be when you grow up.”


5, 8



Make “good trouble” as Rep. John Lewis said. Justice is won, not given.


14, 19



Sometimes it feels really good to say “no.” (Or “no thank you.” Or “$@!#% no!”)


14, 20