Just because you miss your ex that doesn’t mean you want them back. Of course you miss someone you had a deep connection with.
17, 21
Things are rarely black and white. Most situations (and all people) are complex. A nuanced approach is necessary to understand them. You can’t learn - or love, if you’re judging.
17
When you feel like giving up, rest. But then keep going! So many good things ahead. So many people that are meant to be in your life who you haven’t met yet.
18
Actions have consequences- so does inaction. Avoiding a problem or decision is not an effective solution.
18
“Your goals will kick you in the shins and steal your lunch money.” -Jon Acuff. You have to fight back, even though some days you lose. Failure is part of the process. Keep going.
19
Check out the Jesuit Volunteer Corp. A short but deeply meaningful immersion into service, faith in action, selflessness and living on a lot less than you think you need.
19
If they’re not doing anything dangerous, illegal or immoral, let them be. Give them space and independence. (Just first define dangerous/ illegal/ immoral. Then remind them that you are here and would love to hear about anything they want to share.)
14
Go to College results. Org to look at graduation rates. How likely is a rising freshman at that school to stick it out and graduate in 4 years? HUGE variation, it should factor in their decision.
16
Remember that your tend to act like/ think like the people you hang around most. Choose your friends (and your spouse) wisely.
10, 14, 21
I don’t want you to do drugs. It could hurt or $@!#% you. If you get caught doing drugs it could hurt your academic record
12, 15, 18
My love for you will never run out - neither will God’s love / patience run out. I will always instruct, discipline and give consequences for bad behavior- because it’s my job to teach you. But there’s nothing you could do to lose my love. Remind them daily.
5-20
“In the middle of the pain you didn’t cause, the change you didn’t want, the reality you didn’t know was coming . . . your life can still be beautiful.” Lysa TerKeurst
20
Start “home economics” school with them. Laundry, cleaning, cooking, how to change a diaper, comfort a baby, soothe a toddler, what's involved in caring for pets, budgeting for food, keeping track of maintenance schedules for humans, pets, cars and machines. Engage with guests, be a good host, etc. Know when and how to tell someone to GTFO of the house (racist or misogynistic speech, etc.) Every kid needs to learn the art and science of home management. Look for and point out examples in books and movies of good home science skills.
5, 8, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 21
Family & Home
Character, Education & Self-Reliance
Sports, Health, Safety & Appearance
Arts, Literature & Self Expression
Science, Technology, Skills & General Knowledge
Fun, Adventure & Travel
Faith & Philosophy
Finances
Nature, Animals & the Environment
Social Justice, Civics & Humanitarianism
Relationships & Career
There are all kinds of ways people end up destroying their lives in an attempt to cope with fear, loneliness, stress, grief, boredom or anxiety, etc. A few: Drug/alcohol addiction, gambling, shopping/ spending addiction, hoarding, sex addiction, fundamentalism/ extremist politics, workaholics, deadbeats. Nobody starts out trying to be an addict or a nut. It happens when you continually choose to avoid dealing with the pain or anxiety you’re feeling. Choices become habits. Habits can form addictions. That’s why it’s SO important to find healthy ways to deal with difficult feelings or situations. What makes you feel better when you’re upset? A shower, a run, music, a game, friends, quiet time, being outdoors ... There are lots of ways to take good care of your spirit. Keep choosing them. Ask for help when you’re not able to make good choices on your own.
14, 17, 19, 21
If you get comfortable telling little lies it will be easier to tell big lies. Tell the truth, even on small matters. (Except if your friends ask if they look fat. Then it’s okay to lie!)
13, 18, 21
Songs hit so much different (better) when you read the lyrics while listening. Headphones help heighten the experience too.
12, 14, 19, 21
Practice these skills: Love yourself Respect yourself Value yourself Enjoy yourself
4, 6, 8, 12, 15, 17, 21
Our nervous systems are just trying to keep us safe. If you were thrown into fight/flight/fawn today, give yourself some grace.
14, 21
When making decisions or setting goals etc, approach from the perspective of your truest self. That’s integrity.
14, 18, 21
Sometimes when you win, you lose. And when you lose, you win. Meaning that sometimes when you get what you want it doesn’t work out well. And sometimes wonderful things happen as a result of a failure or disappointment. Chin up. There’s a million paths to happiness and fulfillment. If one doesn’t work out your will find another.
12, 21
If you want to know what girls like, read the books they’re reading, watch the shows they watch, etc. Porn is entertainment *not* education. Movies books and shows marketed to 12 year-old boys get it wrong most of the time, can’t learn anything from them. Chick flicks is where you’ll find a little instruction on how to flirt in a non-creepy way, how to kiss, how to be in a healthy relationship. Study the difference between the male gaze vs female gaze.
14
When driving in the car with your kids, ask them to count motorcycles, cyclists, pedestrians. Prize to the highest count! This will train them to be on the lookout for them.
10
Read the instructions. Don't ask for help if you've been given instructions but haven't yet read them. RTFM. (Read the flippin' manual.)
14-21