When making decisions or having a disagreement, it’s very easy to get stuck in defense of your position because we just feel so strongly about it. Without realizing it, we can discount good alternatives and or fail to see the strengths of other people’s viewpoints. As an exercise to avoid getting caught in this trap, make a habit of listing 3 reasons why you might be wrong. Stretch to accommodate the possibility that your strongly-held belief just may be wrong.


14, 18, 21



Physical contact between two people is only fun / appropriate / legal / healthy if both people are into it. If one party objects, demurs or even acts less-than-interested, that’s the ballgame. Stop physical contact immediately. Be kind and respectful at all times.


15, 18



Piano


21



Soap and water go a long way towards fixing many problems.


12, 19



Yes, push yourself and see how far / fast / high you can go (physically, academically, etc.) But remember, you have nothing to prove to anyone except yourself.


14, 17, 21



Are they (we) getting enough quiet?


8, 12-14



Respect people’s privacy. No snooping, eavesdropping, peeping, etc.


11



Read “Spare” by Prince Harry.


20



Plan a neighborhood "Winter Olympics" for snow days. Create indoor and outdoor events.


8



Any thought about self-harm is like a “check engine” light going off for your brain. Seek professional help. You will recover.


12, 14, 15, 17, 19, 21



Be a good guest. Never arrive to a dinner or a party empty handed. Bring a gift: flowers, food, drink, etc.


18



Read poem “Wild Geese” by Mary Oliver. (“...You only have to let the soft animal of your body love what it loves...”)


17



Always remember - cheesecake is the best cake.


21



Mackinac Island trip


10



Which line of poetry would you get tattooed?


17



Sometimes it feels really good to say “no.” (Or “no thank you.” Or “$@!#% no!”)


14, 20



Walking at night during the wintertime remember to wear a bright scarf or something reflective. So many pedestrians get hit when it’s dark outside because they’re wearing dark colors and drivers can’t see them.


15, 20



No threats, not even jokingly.


15



Mallomars in Christmas stockings. Mom NEVER buys Mallomars. But Santa does. (Reticket x 15 years.)


4



A simple trick to calm your nerves: Name 5 things you can hear right now.


5-15



1

Someone else’s success doesn’t subtract from yours. Celebrating with them and encouraging them won’t make you the loser and them the winner. We’re all in this together.


12, 15



There is nothing “basic” about basic human dignity. Never treat a person as though they are put on this earth for your amusement. Everyone deserves to be treated with dignity because we’re all human beings. No matter their age, looks, status, even past wrongdoing, everyone deserves to be treated with dignity.


14



Dress to people will listen to you, not look at you. (This is especially true at school and work.)


15, 18, 21



1

I love that you got chills from watching Wicked. You were 10 and already affected emotionally and physically by music. Bonus points for listening to and acknowledging how your body talks to you.


13, 19, 21



In social situations it's better to talk too little than too much. Don't over-share with people you're not close to.


15



When someone introduces themselves as transgender, it’s no big deal. Simply say “nice to meet you” or “cool.” Then politely ask “What are your pronouns?” And then you know how they prefer to be addressed.


13



Putting up the Christmas tree the weekend or next after Thanksgiving, then watching Polar Express in the glow of the lights. Maybe the smell of gingerbread cookies baking too.


5-9



Cotillion and other social clubs abound in our area. They usually start around 5th or 6th grade. start looking into what might be a good fit. Lay the ground work that they will attend.


1Infant-12



Never open someone else's mail, or listen to their conversation, etc. If it's not your business to know, don't snoop.


14-21