There is so much darkness in the world - keep pushing back against it every way you can. Be a force for good.
14, 16, 21
If they’re not doing anything dangerous, illegal or immoral, let them be. Give them space and independence. (Just first define dangerous/ illegal/ immoral. Then remind them that you are here and would love to hear about anything they want to share.)
14
Pay attention to what people do and what they say. Try to look past their appearance. This is especially true for women, who are almost always judged primarily on the way they look.
12, 15, 19
Just remember sometimes you’re there for a good time but not a long time. Not every relationship (job, journey, experience) is meant to be permanent.)
15, 19, 21
In the words of Bear Grylls... '”Survival can be summed up in three words - never give up. That's the heart of it really. Just keep trying.”
14, 17, 21
Speak up when it’s called for: Fight injustice, stand up for others, etc. but shut the F up if you’re thinking about offering an unsolicited opinion or advice about anything you’re not personally an expert in.
12, 16
When it comes to clothes and makeup, women have one dress code: whatever the f*ck they want. Hijab or bikini, it’s not women’s job to appeal to men. It’s not women’s job to keep men’s appetites subdued.
14, 17, 21
Face it. Whatever it is, show up with your most powerful self. Make decisions from a point of power, not fear. Sometimes the answer is to retreat, care for the injured, mourn the losses. Strategize. Prepare and then attack.
14. 15, 17, 18, 19, 21
You gotta play with them. Down on the floor, at the park, in the water, in the snow. Connect through play, it will be the foundation of your relationship.
1-4
Be yourself. No need to pretend to like something the crowd is doing. Half of them are probably just as unenthused as you are but are afraid to say so.
12, 15
Your life is way bigger than one relationship. Or one grade, or one job, or one choice, or one event, or one gift. Make room for all of it even when some of it will most certainly hurt.
17
Read poem “Wild Geese” by Mary Oliver. (“...You only have to let the soft animal of your body love what it loves...”)
17
Learn how to quiet your demons / that voice that tells you you’re not good enough. Great resource is Dan Harris’ 2022 TED talk.
14, 19, 21
Encourage creativity, science and engineering: Make a craft station / work bench for projects. Fill it with all kinds of art supplies, engineering kits, tools, pegboard, etc. Stock safety equipment like goggles and make sure the area has good lighting. Lots of ideas on Pinterest, etc.
8
The more books you read, the better. Carve out time without screens and read every day.
8, 10, 12, 14, 16, 21
Slow down and normalize making out without it leading to anything more. Physical intimacy can mean lots of things that aren’t sex: kissing should feel safe, personal and playful. ALWAYS be respectful and never assume that just because your sweetie is into it that they want to go farther. If your goal is to “score” do it by yourself.
15, 21