Thomas Jefferson’s Ten Rules of Conduct. This makes a good exercise for penmanship or for writing “lines” as instructional punishment.


11



“First the pain. Then the waiting. Then the rising.” Glennon Doyle


16, 21



“Pain that is not transformed is transmitted.” Fr. Richard Rohr


14



Talk about what’s normal and what’s abnormal reactions to alcohol and drugs. Basically all kinds of feels from euphoria to paranoia to jealousy or infatuation, etc. Getting sick is normal but blacking out is not. *Anything that could interfere with breath or circulation is dangerous.


13, 15, 17



Read “Lighter” by Yung Pueblo. Read it every year.


17, 19, 21



When you’re tired, the next best thing to sleep is a shower.


16



“Human beings are linked, not ranked.” - Gloria Steinem (f*ck the patriarchy)


15



I like to say a Hail Mary just to join the chorus, to add my voice to the millions who are praying in that moment. The world has plenty of people thinking or doing horrible things, we need to add to the good, add to the beauty as much as possible at every turn. Saying a quick prayer is sometimes all I can muster.


9-19



We don’t snoop. Never read a correspondence (email, letter, text, note, etc.) that is not intended for your eyes, or listen in to a conversation that is not intended for your ears. The right to privacy is sacred. Always respect people’s privacy and set the expectation that others do the same for you.


10



You may lose a relationship but you keep the love. It becomes a part of you. It changes you for the better.


15, 19, 21



Someone I admire is __________. Talk about someone you admire and why. Ask them to do the same. Do this often as you can. Reticket through age 18.


4



Wintergreen snow sledding trip.


6



Don’t be a dick.


21



Violent thunderstorms can be dangerous. Avoid driving or being out in severe weather: car accidents, downed trees, high winds, lightning, flash floods, etc. are all potentially deadly. Don’t take your safety for granted. If the weather is severe, stay sheltered unless you absolutely positively have to be out and about.


12-14, 16, 21



I did my best to guide you, but I’m sure there are many areas where my take is just not aligned with yours. That’s okay! Bunny please don’t feel any obligation to believe what I believe or take any advice, or continue any tradition mentioned in this Coda.


21



"Love is nothing more and nothing less than relentlessly showing up for your people." - Glennon Doyle


18-21



You don’t have to like everyone you go to school with, or work with. You don’t even have to like your family! BUT, you have to treat everyone with respect and kindness. They are worthy of that no matter what your opinion of them may be.


15, 21



Mindset for a breakup: “I’d rather adjust to your absence than be continually frustrated by your presence.” Can work with romantic partners, jobs, habits...anything you’re hanging on to that you know you should let go of.


19



Let's all go on a "complaining diet." See how long we can go without a complaint for a weekend. Repeat often.


9-15



Be generous in all things. That is my hope for you.


14, 18, 21



1

“Courage is cheaper than Channel. It works better too.” - Scott Galloway


14, 15, 16, 21



When you begin dating it’s all butterflies and moonbeams. Eventually you’re going to do or say something that hurts the other person and vice versa. For that matter, eventually you’ll disagree about something. It’s VERY important to consider how they handle it. Nobody is perfect, it may not be pretty but it had better be civil. If not, don’t think for a second that they will change. Get outta there.


15, 21



If they’re not doing anything dangerous, illegal or immoral, let them be. Give them space and independence. (Just first define dangerous/ illegal/ immoral. Then remind them that you are here and would love to hear about anything they want to share.)


14



Watch the news together. Local and national. Today Show has both of mornings are easier than evenings.


12, 13, 14, 15



I’m going to start you in Mathnasium or some other STEM (math) activity. Not because I want u to score high on your SAT but because I want You to be confident in your math skills you will use it every day and it will come in handy no matter what you choose to do for a living


7



Pray for the courage to be yourself.


10, 13, 15, 17, 21



Give him a copy of The Secret Lives of Great Composers by Elizabeth Lunday.


14



If you can afford to send flowers when a baby is born or when someone dies, do so.


21



Never take friendships for granted. Show up. Reach out. Be there when they need you. Friends are gifts; tend to those relationships with love.


15, 20



You remember experiences, connections. Not stuff. Don’t get too caught up in stuff.


12, 15, 17, 21