“You don’t get what you deserve. You get what you negotiate.” - name escapes me


15, 19, 21



Before speaking (or texting) ask yourself three questions: Is it kind? Is it true? Is it necessary? If not all three, don’t speak. (PS “kind” isn’t the same as good news. You can deliver bad news with kindness.)


11, 14, 20



Practice people skills: Firm handshake, introducing yourself, being courteous when encountering / being on receiving end of someone’s rude behavior, offering your seat (never sit while someone with gray hair, pregnant belly, any sort of injury or really anyone who is older or who works harder is standing.)


10



Three things you cannot change: The past, the truth, someone else.


18



Failures are part of life. Feel free to fail. But behave with honor. Never do anything to tarnish your good name.


14, 18



Find one or two scary documentaries on the dangers of gambling. Watch together. Betting on sports is a big thing in some schools and I want to scare the $@!#% out of him about how bad gambling can screw up his life. Check online tools from gamblers anonymous.


15



If you don’t know what to do ask yourself how you want to feel. Once you have a good idea of that you can find lots of paths to get you there.


16, 21



Rudeness is a weak person’s imitation of strength.


13, 21



The person who lives in the body gets to say who touches that body.


5



Your emotional energy is sacred, and there’s nothing wrong with treating it that way. If connection is what you’re looking for, save your emotional energy for those who will cherish it and share their own. - Yung Pueblo from his book “Lighter”


12, 14, 17, 21



Never take friendships for granted. Show up. Reach out. Be there when they need you. Friends are gifts; tend to those relationships with love.


15, 20



Pick a project on Instructables.com and work on it together this winter.


7



Practice these skills: Love yourself Respect yourself Value yourself Enjoy yourself


4, 6, 8, 12, 15, 17, 21



Read A Mother’s Reckoning by Sue Klebold (mother of Columbine shooter.)


12



I hope you become more of yourself with every passing year. I love you so.


21



Make a separate piggie bank together for money to donate. Talk about how we manage what we have thoughtfully: Save some, spend some, donate some.


5-8



Always keep a clean rag within arm’s reach in the car. You never know when you might need to clean-up a spill or smash a spider while driving 50mph.


16



Turn on the closed captions on tv. Reading them is almost unconscious. Even better, set the audio to a language other than English and turn on English captions.


4-9



Hold yourself to account when you screw up but give yourself some grace. Instead of “I’m such a terrible person” ask yourself “”How can I make up for this? What can I learn from this? How can I do better next time?”


10, 12, 15, 19



Sex: There's no single way to do it "right" but there are lots of ways to do it wrong. Not being respectful and tender towards your partner is usually at the root of "wrong" ways to do it. Also, there is no rush. You may think all your friends are "doing it." They're not. Take your time.


16



Don’t have a clue? (Relationships / career / character, etc.) The solutions can be found in books. READ! Novels, biographies, history, religion, humor, politics, finance, sports, and whatever sparks your interests at the moment!) You’ll learn about the world, and you’ll learn about yourself. READ!!!! (or listen!)


12, 15, 18, 20



Grandpa didn’t drink coffee, but when he was in Korea he used to drink it just so he could hold the cup and keep his hands warm. (During the Korean War be enlisted in the Marines with a bunch of his buddies right after high school.)


14, 21



Re-Read "Girls and Sex: Navigating the New Landscape" by Peggy Orenstein.


13



I forget who said it but I love it: “I don’t know what I think until I write it down.” Paper and pen. Write. Keep it or burn it whatever you like. Journal or make a list or bullet points or narrative…whatever. Just write.


15, 21



Dream big. Work hard.


18



They can shower themselves if you install a hand-held shower head and install a suction cup wall-mount shower head holder lower on the shower wall. It’s easy to do and very cheap. They love it!


4-6



Gambling is a very tricky thing. It can get out of hand easily because of how the brain works. That initial “rush” of excitement starts to burn pathways, and causes chemical reactions that need to be fed more and more. Before you know it you’re gambling more often and with more money, trying to achieve that rush. Be very, very careful with gambling. Gambling casinos and online gaming know this and they exploit it to make TONS of money. It’s a scam. Avoid gambling all together or step away very early.


16, 18, 19, 21



American Sign Language course


15



Physical contact between two people is only fun / appropriate / legal / healthy if both people are into it. If one party objects, demurs or even acts less-than-interested, that’s the ballgame. Stop physical contact immediately. Be kind and respectful at all times.


15, 18



Check out Harmonia School on Mill St Music Art Theatre


6