People don’t abandon people they love, they abandon people they’re using.


19, 21



Toddlers fall... a lot. Most falls are harmless but sometimes bad accidents happen. Head injuries are scary because they bleed and swell. If bleeding doesn't stop within a few minutes or you can see it's a big gash, head to the urgent care. And remember if the swelling goes out (“goose egg”) that’s a good thing: Better out than in.


2



When COVID started my first thought was “Holy sh*t Trump is going to cancel the 2020 election because of pandemic.” Thank God I was wrong.


15



What do you think about the word “refugee?” Let’s talk about what it means. Personally, I don’t understand all the complexities of immigration policy, but I figure anyone who escapes violence and walks hundreds of miles with kids in tow, trying to get to safety and gain an opportunity for a better life for their family can live next-door to me anytime.


13



Let decency be like a religion to you. Practice it …but don’t preach it.


14



"Discipline is helping a child solve a problem. Punishment is making a child suffer for having a problem. To raise problem solvers, focus on solutions, not retribution.”- L.R KNost


2-15



You’re not going to be everyone’s cup of tea. What’s something worth being hated for?


11, 14, 17, 21



“Your goals will kick you in the shins and steal your lunch money.” -Jon Acuff. You have to fight back, even though some days you lose. Failure is part of the process. Keep going.


19



Ask him for Christmas present: recite Andy Weir’s “The Egg.” Bonus points for memorization! Also great idea for audition tape. )I’m assuming you’ll be in theater!) xoxo


15



It’s fine to keep it simple when you pray: Thank You for __ I’m sorry for ___ Help me with ____ Keep _____ close to you You are awesome! I trust you.


14



There’s a great scene in Game of Thrones where Tyrion is trying to prepare for an impending siege of the city but he doesn’t know how to begin planning a defense. Until he starts thinking about how his enemy is most likely to attack. Defense is reactive, offensive is proactive.


19



Plan a few screen-free weekends every year. (Reticket until 16.)


7



Someone else’s success doesn’t subtract from yours. Celebrating with them and encouraging them won’t make you the loser and them the winner. We’re all in this together.


12, 15



SAT prep https://www.nytimes.com/2017/04/10/opinion/how-i-learned-to-take-the-sat-like-a-rich-kid.html?referer=http%253A%252F%252Fm.facebook.com%252F


16



Choose to love despite the rage. See poem by Lucas Jones “ I Will Teach My Sons to be Dangerous Men.”


12, 14, 16, 19, 21



Explain the concept: "You catch more flies with honey than with vinegar."


6



“Human beings are linked, not ranked.” - Gloria Steinem (f*ck the patriarchy)


15



I forget who said it but I love it: “I don’t know what I think until I write it down.” Paper and pen. Write. Keep it or burn it whatever you like. Journal or make a list or bullet points or narrative…whatever. Just write.


15, 21



Assume any email or text you send will be distributed.


12, 15



Happiness: Someone (or some creature) to love, something to do and something to hope for. Don’t get too caught up in the rat race, money doesn’t mean you’ve arrived.


20



I don’t want you to do drugs. It could hurt or $@!#% you. If you get caught doing drugs it could hurt your academic record


12, 15, 18



Bring Christmas cookies to local fire station and police station. (Annually)


7-14



Police officers and members of the military put their lives on the line to protect us. Be respectful of them and thank them for their service.


9



Don’t quit your job until you have another job. Suck it up and make the best out of it.


21



“ It was my high school drama teacher who made sure I knew there was space for me in this world. Her kind words had a tremendous impact on my life. If you don’t know where to begin, start with “I see you. I love you. I’m so happy you’re here.”   -Chasten Buttigieg


12



Rock those babies to sleep as often as you can.


0, 1, 2



There’s a lot of virtue to the “Let them” theory of parenting. It’s their life. Drop out of school? Not what I would want, but as long as I’ve had my say, the decision is theirs to make. The mess will be theirs too, but that’s just life. Stop trying to control everyone and everything. Give yourself and everyone else a break and as long as it’s nothing harmful, let them. Don’t try to bend them to your will, and keep your opinions to yourself.


12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18



If your car is overheating turn on the heat full blast. It draws heat off the engine.


16



Remind them they’re safe to feel whatever they’re feeling.


2, 12, 21



Quoting Sarah Bessel: “One of the best things Jen Hatmaker has taught me about raising big kids: if they get on the roller coaster of Big Emotions, my main first job is to stay on the platform. I am NOT to get in the car and ride up


12