“Remember Divas and Friends, if you don’t think good things about yourself, how do you expect anybody else to?” - Sheryl Lee Ralph


11, 12. 14. 16, 17, 19, 21



You never know what people are going through. Depression, PTSD, anxiety could look like avoidance, anger, risk-taking, promiscuity, etc. Look out for friends, coworkers and loved ones who may be in pain. You don’t need to solve their problem, just allow for the possibility that they’re going through something. Try to give them the benefit of the doubt and not write off “bad” behavior as a character flaw. Offer a non-judgmental ear.


15, 20



Remember the hymn we used to sing at bedtime when you were little? “What Does the Lord Require of You?” To seek justice. To love kindness. To walk humbly with your God. (Walk humbly means to remember God is so very good. That he loves you and is for you and wants you to talk to him, listen for him, love him, serve him.) No matter what religion you practice (or don’t practice) I hope you’ll remember that.


17



Listen to the radio stations they listen to. Know their favorite songs and artists.


12



Grandpa used to describe injuries and medical procedures as “It’s a nothin.” I think of this every time I have to endure something painful.


14, 18



“You have to meet people where they are. Sometimes, you have to leave them there.” -Iyanla Vanzant


21



Keep stuff on hand for guests. Be ready to be a good host / hostess at any moment.


16-21



Know the difference between an inconvenience and a tragedy. Hint: If it can be fixed with money or effort, it’s probably not a tragedy.


15, 20



On a job interview, mention a high-level educational goal such as MBA or law school. Their estimation of you will go up without them even realizing it. Your offer will be higher. Also follow, up with a brief but we’ll-written (professional) thank you note/email whatever.


17, 19, 21



Sometimes, no matter how great a thing is it can’t make up for what it’s not.


14, 19, 21



When you feel sad, mad, confused or in any way upset, go to a quiet place to catch your breath. If you can sit with it and let it tell you what it wants to tell you, then you become its friend. But if you try to deny the feeling, or numb it, it grows much stronger and it fights you.


9, 13, 19



“I need help. But I don’t know what I need help with. Could you ask me a few questions and help me figure it out?” Keep this one in your back pocket.


5, 7, 11, 13, 16, 19, 21



Sometimes when you win, you lose. And when you lose, you win. Meaning that sometimes when you get what you want it doesn’t work out well. And sometimes wonderful things happen as a result of a failure or disappointment. Chin up. There’s a million paths to happiness and fulfillment. If one doesn’t work out your will find another.


12, 21



Small joys are what gets you through big grief.


14, 18, 21



Learn about current trends in social media. Figure out where you draw boundaries, what platforms are allowed and not. Teach them how to stay safe, be positive and kind and always respectful.


9



It’s not fair to resent someone for being exactly who they are.


17, 21



There are all kinds of parenting and mommy blogs with good resources. A quick Google search will get you started.


Infant



Watch film “Radio” (2003) and talk about being brave. Teach them that doing what’s right takes courage.


8



One regret I have is how sure I was that I was in the right. Looking back I can see now that there were plenty of times when I was the a-hole. I wish I had been able to be circumspect.


14, 17, 21



Go to Planet Word and do the Lexicon Lane puzzle experience.


12



You're about to come into a ton of energy and strength. It will seem like a lot to manage at first, but you'll get used to it and learn to use it constructively. Push your limits (within reason.) Challenge yourself.


13



Okay algebra and geometry but other than that, spend time practicing addition and subtraction, multiplication and division. That’s 99% of the math you’ll need to know if you’re not going to be an engineer, etc.


10, 14, 15, 18, 21



Talking to people you disagree with is sometimes difficult. But it doesn’t have to be. Enter every conversion assuming you have something to learn.


14, 18, 21



NEVER sit while someone near you is working.


14-21



Set up a 529 plan. Virginia has a great plan if you don't want to do too much research https://www.savingforcollege.com/


birth-age 3



“What do you think about keeping things PG-rated for a while? We’re both just figuring stuff out. The last thing I’d want to do is hurt you.” Or whatever spin you want to put on the idea that there’s no rush, and plenty of amazing sensations to experience and explore, long before things go further than kissing. Hang out in that PG range as long as possible. And if you can’t talk with your partner about that then you probably shouldn’t be having sex anyway.


13, 14, 15, 16, 17



Sometimes it’s easier to describe what a thing is *not* than to describe what it is.


14, 21



When you see someone in military uniform, thank them for their service. Hold the door open for them, etc. If they are behind you in line at Starbucks, pay for their coffee. At the very least, look them in the eye and smile - they’ve made a tremendous sacrifice and you should acknowledge that.


12, 16, 21



"Discipline is helping a child solve a problem. Punishment is making a child suffer for having a problem. To raise problem solvers, focus on solutions, not retribution.”- L.R KNost


2-15



Don’t stay down too long.


16, 19, 21