“Be brave. Be resilient. Be kind. Be grateful.” -Hillary Rodham Clinton


12



Numbing doesn’t work. Let it hurt, let it heal, then it lets itself go.


15,21



The Paradoxical Commandments by Keith Kent: 1. People are illogical, unreasonable, and self-centred. Love them anyway. 2. If you do good, people will accuse you of selfish ulterior motives. Do good anyway. 3. If you are successful, you win false friends and true enemies. Succeed anyway. 4. The good you do today will be forgotten tomorrow. Do good anyway. 5. Honesty and frankness make you vulnerable. Be honest and frank anyway. 6. The biggest men and women with the biggest ideas can be shot down by the smallest men and women with the smallest minds. Think big anyway. 7. People favour underdogs but follow only top dogs. Fight for a few underdogs anyway. 8. What you spend years building may be destroyed overnight. Build anyway. 9. People really need help but may attack you if you do help them. Help people anyway. 10. Give the world the best you have and you’ll get kicked in the teeth. Give the world the best you have anyway.


14, 17, 21



If it costs you your peace it’s too expensive.


19



Define success for yourself. Be wary of becoming a corporate coal miner. Why bust your $@!#% for years and in school so you can bust your $@!#% for years in a soul-sucking job? Regardless of compensation that is not success in my book. How do you define success? For me it's "Do good. Have fun. Belong to a tribe. Meaningful work with people you love.Make enough money to pay the bills and not have to worry about the basics."


17



Anger is the bodyguard of sadness.


12-15, 21



We’re born full of love. Life is about choosing where you want to put it. -xo


15, 19, 21



Let’s look for examples of bravery.


8



Don’t quit your job until you have another job. Suck it up and make the best out of it.


21



“But what is grief if not love preserving?” - Unknown


18



Check out fencing. Local fencing club has classes for kids and adults all ages. They also do birthday parties, so that might be something different that would be fun for him and his friends.


10



"Surround yourself with people who trust and get YOU." - Josh Groban, High Point University 2018 commencement address. Note, I love that quote because it speaks to having a tribe, a close group of friends. But it's also important to surround yourself with people who challenge you, who may not agree with you or have the same perspective as you do.


14-19



Read Big Magic by Liz Gilbert. Re-read every 5-10 years.


19, 21



“Pain that is not transformed is transmitted.” Fr. Richard Rohr


14



Just let a sweet moment be. There’s a time for jokes or small talk, but sometimes silence is best.


15,21



“You have to meet people where they are. Sometimes, you have to leave them there.” -Iyanla Vanzant


21



Talk about what patterns of abuse look like. Teach them to recognize red flags like love-bombing, isolating from friends and family, controlling behavior and threats of violence and/or self-harm.


14, 16, 20, 21



It’s best not to cuss but writing bad words is even worse than speaking them. Even in casual texting, etc. Always an asterisk in place of a vowel to avoid being rude.


16



A person is only as good as how they treat you when they are angry with you.


17



When they turn 18 they should have a will, a financial power of attorney and a medical PoA.


17,18



“It’s alright to be yourself. There ARE people in this world who will love you.” -Fred Rogers


12, 14, 17, 21



Trust fall. Learn to be vulnerable. You can’t say the wrong thing to the right person.


12, 16, 19, 21



To quote Harvard professor Adam Grant: “Argue like you’re right and listen like you’re wrong.”


15



Anyone who asks you to violate your values doesn’t deserve your allegiance.


16, 21



Wintergreen snow sledding trip.


6



Of all the things I worry about, addiction is very high on the list. Begin talks (age appropriate) about addiction.


7



At dinner time, go around the table and share your “highs and lows” for the day. (Re-ticket up to 21)


5



Follow love and kindness wherever they may take you and you’ll be fine. xoxo


13, 17, 21



My mom did laundry twice a week: Tuesdays and Saturdays. She separated colors! It never piled up and we all had clean clothes. I do laundry daily, it's never done and we can't find what we need. Ask Grandma what was her secret to the science of laundry. Because it's now your job to do all your own laundry!


14