“Never allow anyone to be humiliated in your presence.” - Eliezer "Elie" Wiesel


12, 14, 17, 21



If they like you you’ll know. If they don’t you’ll be confused.


15, 21



There’s a lot of virtue to the “Let them” theory of parenting. It’s their life. Drop out of school? Not what I would want, but as long as I’ve had my say, the decision is theirs to make. The mess will be theirs too, but that’s just life. Stop trying to control everyone and everything. Give yourself and everyone else a break and as long as it’s nothing harmful, let them. Don’t try to bend them to your will, and keep your opinions to yourself.


12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18



Self-care is active not passive. (Zoning-out on the couch or sleeping all day isn’t self-care.)


13, 15



Learn how to release energy consciously, or you’ll end up releasing it unconsciously onto your loved ones in a negative way like yelling or arguing. Breathe, sing, shout, cry, sweat, play, bake, whatever floats your boat!


1-21



Look for examples of people who have dealt with loss without giving in to bitterness. What do they have in common?


17



Always hold the door open for the next person.


4-14



1

A dear friend of the family used to swear by the many healing properties of Seabreeze (alcohol based astringent.) She’d prescribe it for everything from sunburn to bug bites, rashes and scrapes. it stung like heck but she was right: The stuff is a miracle! I always keep a bottle Seabreeze around and think of Mimi every time I use it.


18



Rent kayaks.


14-16



There is an expression “God only gives you what you can handle.” I think that’s backwards. I think that God gives you the grace you need to handle whatever comes your way. He is faithful and generous. I think that’s what “Be not afraid” means.


17



Great reminders for how to deal with belligerent kids. https://mailchi.mp/ahaparenting/8-things-you-can-do-when-your-child-is-belligerent


4



Led Zeppelin, Queen, The Who, Lynyard Skynard. Listen with headphones, listen alone, listen with friends. So many more good bands but if you start with these you’ll be well on your way.


15, 17, 21



Be kinder than necessary.


9, 15, 21



You're about to come into a ton of energy and strength. It will seem like a lot to manage at first, but you'll get used to it and learn to use it constructively. Push your limits (within reason.) Challenge yourself.


13



Quoting Glennon Doyle: “Things can feel hard and sad and still be exactly right, all at the same time.” She’s referring to her divorce but the sentiment applies to all kinds of tough choices that we all make. Very few choices feel 100% right.


17



Book “8 Candles and a Tree” about celebrating interfaith holidays.


7



Think about God as the driver of our car or the pilot of a plane- He gets us through the storm, he shows us and encourages us to enjoy the beauty of the scenery. But all the while He keeps us with him. He doesn’t cause the storms, He gets us through them. We can trust in his goodness and wisdom even when the conditions are really scary.


5, 12



Enroll in a CPR course. Re-certify every year.


13



Begin colon cancer screening at 40. We have a family history on both sides.


21



A simple trick to calm your nerves: Name 5 things you can hear right now.


5-15



The bull-sh*t never ends. Dealing with the bull-sh*t IS your job. If you think you’ll ever reach a “post-bullsh*t stage in your life, you’re wrong.


12, 15, 19, 21



“You’ll never be alone when you carry a poet in your pocket.” - John Adams Bring a book with you wherever you go.


12, 19



Watch the local news together.


12



American Sign Language course


15



Read “Attack of the Black Rectangles” by Amy Sarid King.


12



They are looking for your support, not your solutions. Applies to all ages.


2, 3, 4, 8, 11, 13, 16, 18, 20, 21



In professional setting: Limit one exclamation point per email, if any. Definitely no emoticons.


19



Teach tuck to drive


15