I heard a song today, “I love you to the bone” by Sammy Copley. It’s a beautiful story of a lifelong love. It’s my prayer for you that your spouse will have that song played at your funeral after you shared a 75 year- long happy marriage. It’s my prayer that your life is filled with love and laughter, and most importantly a partner who grows with you in all good things. And that you love each other to the bone.


21



Read Elizabeth Gilbert’s book on creativity. Re-read every few years!


17



I stopped worrying about you by the time you were seven. (I’m not talking about your safety and health, that I’ll always worry about!) But I knew you were a joyful, generous, kind, smart and well-mannered person. You were a great friend, supportive and fun. You would be a good partner, and would contribute so much good to society. I could see you had a curious mind, an active imagination and more than a healthy dose of courage.


15, 21



Always keep a clean rag within arm’s reach in the car. You never know when you might need to clean-up a spill or smash a spider while driving 50mph.


16



"Surround yourself with people who trust and get YOU." - Josh Groban, High Point University 2018 commencement address. Note, I love that quote because it speaks to having a tribe, a close group of friends. But it's also important to surround yourself with people who challenge you, who may not agree with you or have the same perspective as you do.


14-19



Sometimes you don’t know what to do, can’t figure out what’s the right direction for you. That’s okay. Try thinking about what you *don’t* want to do. (See John Cusack career plans speech in 1989 movie “Say Anything.”


11, 16, 19, 21



Always have a 5 year plan. Be thinking of goals you want to work towards, however big or small. What inspires you? What drives you? What do you want to accomplish or cure or solve?


15, 17, 21



Enroll in cooking lessons. We'll need to find you someone who knows how to cook. (Don't tell mom I said that.)


14



A Morning Offering by _____ (Excerpt) ...May my mind come alive today To the invisible geography That invites me to new frontiers, To break the dead shell of yesterdays, To risk being disturbed and changed. May I have the courage today To live the life that I would love, To postpone my dream no longer But do at last what I came here for And waste my heart on fear no more.“


19



Put your purse, (wallet,bag, phone, or shoe) in the backseat with the baby. Unattended babies die every day and it’s my worst nightmare.


Infant-3, 21



Read “Raising a Screen Smart Kid” by Julianna Miner before you consider giving him a phone.


10



“Tell me something you want to be when you grow up.”


5, 8



Make “good trouble” as Rep. John Lewis said. Justice is won, not given.


14, 19



Take heart. There are lots of terrible things in the world - Poverty, disease, injustice, natural disasters...Thankfully, good FAR outweighs the bad: Love, Faith, Art, friendship, healing, creativity, community, innovation, beauty and renewal to name just a few. Focus on the good. Relish in the countless expressions of goodness. Work hard to preserve, protect, and advance them.


18



No bragging. Don’t toot your own horn.


11, 15, 21



They can shower themselves if you install a hand-held shower head and install a suction cup wall-mount shower head holder lower on the shower wall. It’s easy to do and very cheap. They love it!


4-6



Book “30 Days of Sex Talks” comes in three volumes: Ages 3-7, 8-11 And 13 . Very highly rated. Available on Amazon.


4, 8, 12



You are never too old to play in the snow.


16



Plastic stackable dresser - 5 drawers labeled for days of the week. Put outfits in each. No drama emergencies on school days, the week’s wardrobe is planned out.


5



Cotillion and other social clubs abound in our area. They usually start around 5th or 6th grade. start looking into what might be a good fit. Lay the ground work that they will attend.


1Infant-12



Worry less about molding them and focus on loving them.


2, 4, 6, 8, 10, 12, 14, 16, 17, 18, 19, 21



Are you proud of the work you did today? Were you respectful and kind? Did you tell the truth and look out for the little ones? If so, I’m happy. I don’t care one bit about grades.


5



It’s very easy to wander into trouble- not usually easy to wander out of it.


12



Give people the benefit of the doubt. Unless someone gives you a reason not to trust them, assign the best possible motive to their actions.


14-18



Educate yourself. You can't solve a problem if you don't understand it.


14-21



One of the most important things I can teach you is to help you learn how to deal with big feelings without resorting to destructive behavior or violence. Everyone on the planet will experience loss, disappointment, grief, heartbreak, betrayal, etc. Tools to deal with these feelings: counseling, journaling, art, music, exercise, meditation, breathing exercises, yoga, being in nature, talking with friends, joining a support group, movement like dancing or skating, singing, acting, anthropomorphic dialogue with your emotions, naming your emotions and describe how they physically feel in your body. Asking the emotion what it needs you to know.


1Infant-20



Adjust your expectations but never lower your standards.


12, 15, 18, 21



Paying extra for organic isn’t always worth it but I ALWAYS buy organic apples. They taste better and don’t have the pesticides, etc.


18



No matter how successful you become you’re still expected to act with integrity and respect.


14, 18, 21



Practice being okay with someone misunderstanding you. Not everyone is going to “get” you. That’s okay.


14, 19, 21