“Praise in public. Discipline in private.” This is good advice for when you’re a parent and for when you’re a boss.


20



Life is difficult...Focus on the joy.


16, 20



Play to win but play fair. Be a gracious winner. Someone has to lose. Sometimes it will be you. Don’t whine.


10



You always have a choice. Always.


15, 19, 21



Purchase book "All Are Welcome" by Alexandra Penfold to prep him for kindergarten.


5



Practice being okay with someone misunderstanding you. Not everyone is going to “get” you. That’s okay.


14, 19, 21



There are things you should not say: Never comment or ask a woman about her age or weight. Never comment on how many kids someone has (or doesn’t have.) The size, timing, composition, etc of someone else’s family is not your business to weigh in on. You never know who is struggling with loss or infertility, etc. And if someone announces they are expecting their seventh kid, the only correct response is “Congratulations” “How are you feeling?” etc. Just like you would if it was their first. Never ask someone how much weight they lost. If they’ve lost weight, just say “You look wonderful/amazing/ fantastic, etc.” And of course never comment on anyone having gained weight. Just say “You look wonderful.” And never never never ask someone how much money they earn or how much money they have, or how much they owe or paid for something, etc. People’s finances are personal, and are just not any of your business.


15, 20



“Human beings are linked, not ranked.” - Gloria Steinem (f*ck the patriarchy)


15



Check out Long Lake Summer Camp in NY. Theater, the arts, etc.


12, 13, 14, 15, 16



No matter how smart you are or how much you know, you still don’t know everything. ALWAYS be willing to learn and to change your position when faced with new information or perspective.


15, 20



Your emotional energy is sacred, and there’s nothing wrong with treating it that way. If connection is what you’re looking for, save your emotional energy for those who will cherish it and share their own. - Yung Pueblo from his book “Lighter”


12, 14, 17, 21



Summers in Ireland and UK Drama camps? I could work from there while he did his thing.


12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17



A lesson from author Tom Zumba. I hope you’ll never need it: “There is nothing nothing easy about this thing called grief. Nothing. But I ask you to please please please say yes more often than you say no. Say yes to you. To possibility. To hope. To love. To life. To healing. Please choose the light more often than you choose the darkness. Not that there aren't gifts in the darkness. There are. But it's often so much easier to find them the gifts in the light. Do all you can to stay in the light. Please remember that the person you love so so so dearly lived. Don't forget that. He lived. She lived. Here with you. And your relationship continues. Always. Don't be so overwhelmed and paralyzed and pissed off that he died that she died that you spend most of your time focusing on their death. Focus on your life. Together. Say yes as often as you can. Choose light as often as you can. Remember that he lived as often as you can. Don't lose her in the details of her death. This thing called grief is hard hard hard work. But you are stronger than you think. His book is called Permission to Mourn


21



Geocaching


5-11



Practice people skills: Firm handshake, introducing yourself, being courteous when encountering / being on receiving end of someone’s rude behavior, offering your seat (never sit while someone with gray hair, pregnant belly, any sort of injury or really anyone who is older or who works harder is standing.)


10



It's natural to avoid change. Try to learn to accept change, embrace it if you can! Change is good. :)


15



Teen years are a whole other ballgame. Find a community and stay up with trends and news. Check out the website Raising Teens Today.


12



Watch Abby Wambach's 2018 Barnard commencement address together.


16



Don’t get discouraged in how slow change comes. Keep fighting for good. Some people will say it’s naive but they’re wrong. Every good thing we have in America is the result of good people fighting a seemingly impossible fight.


16, 21



Practice making yourself do something you don’t feel like doing. Practice and it gets easier


10, 12, 15, 18, 21



Always hold the door open for the next person.


4-14



Start a yearly “review” right before school year. Raise allowance as appropriate. If they want more money, they’ll have to take on more responsibilities.


8



They’re not rejecting you, they’re just becoming who they are. Give them some space.


12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17



I hope you find a partner with who are your most authentic self, and who you love for who they genuinely are.


15, 21



You can’t selectively numb feelings. The inclination to drink, use, shop, gamble, etc. is real but it’s a lie that it will make you feel better. Numbing makes this much, much worse. So feel! The good, the bad, the scary. Talk about your feelings, write about them or create something from your feelings. This is how to process in a healthy way.


16, 20



Practice "shaking off the sleepy." It's hard to wake up when your body is screaming for more sleep. If you practice, you'll get better. Get up, get in the shower and shake off the sleepy. It works!


6, 7, 13-15



Attend a school board meeting or some sort of government meeting. Attend / participate.


13



Wintergreen snow sledding trip.


6



Zero-cost method to reaching your goals (academic, career, fitness and health): Get up an hour earlier. You’ll be amazed how much you can get done and how “on top of it” you feel.


16, 18, 21



“It’s not as important how a message is received compared to how it is sent.” Sometimes you have to have uncomfortable conversations but the can always be kind and loving. Sometimes your message won’t land well, but if you expressed yourself truthfully and kindly, that’s not your burden to bear.


16