If you’re going to be wrong about someone, let it be because you believed the best of them. (Give people the benefit of the doubt.) put it this way— I’d rather be wrong about my husband being a moral person who would never cheat, then come to find out he had done, than I would like to be wrong about him being a horrible person only to find out later he was faithful all along.
“It’s okay to be sad. It’s okay to grieve. Because you can also live your life, and love your life, and be happy too.” Excellent advice from 9/11 survivor.
Encourage creativity, science and engineering: Make a craft station / work bench for projects. Fill it with all kinds of art supplies, engineering kits, tools, pegboard, etc. Stock safety equipment like goggles and make sure the area has good lighting. Lots of ideas on Pinterest, etc.
Practice having difficult conversations. There’s no way to get around being on the giving or receiving end of unpleasant news such as breakups, firings, news of a loved one’s passing, etc. You need to get good at having hard conversations, or else you’ll end up in jobs and relationships you don’t want to be in.
Start explaining wants vs. needs. Continue explaining for the next 30 years.
We don’t always get what we want. That’s okay. 4 year olds can begin to understand this.
There are all kinds of ways people end up destroying their lives in an attempt to cope with fear, loneliness, stress, grief, boredom or anxiety, etc.
A few: Drug/alcohol addiction, gambling, shopping/ spending addiction, hoarding, sex addiction, fundamentalism/ extremist politics, workaholics, deadbeats.
Nobody starts out trying to be an addict or a nut. It happens when you continually choose to avoid dealing with the pain or anxiety you’re feeling. Choices become habits. Habits can form addictions.
That’s why it’s SO important to find healthy ways to deal with difficult feelings or situations. What makes you feel better when you’re upset? A shower, a run, music, a game, friends, quiet time, being outdoors ... There are lots of ways to take good care of your spirit. Keep choosing them. Ask for help when you’re not able to make good choices on your own.
You’ll start dating soon. Have fun! Good luck. Prepare yourself for broken hearts. They come with the territory. (Worth it.) Talk about healthy ways to manage breakups and fear of breaking up.
There is an expression “God only gives you what you can handle.” I think that’s backwards. I think that God gives you the grace you need to handle whatever comes your way. He is faithful and generous. I think that’s what “Be not afraid” means.
Make a deal: flying lessons IF he takes dancing lessons. A man has got to know how to dance!
In fact, tack on some other prerequisites like good grades and responsible behavior
Sometimes I think the best way to take care of them is to teach them to take care of others: Littler kids, sick or disabled, those who’ve been left out.
You are 100% replaceable at work. You are not replaceable at home. A good work ethic is crucial but don’t drain yourself to the point that you don’t have anything left for your family and friends.
Relationships can end beautifully and bravely. They’re not all going to be forever. It’s much better to grieve the end of a relationship than to endure an unhealthy one.