Maria Shriver has lots of great parenting advice. One of my favorites is (paraphrased): “Children need what you need: to be seen, to be talked to, to feel safe and loved.”


Infant



“Vulnerability is not about winning or losing, it’s about showing up and being seen.” -Brene Brown Be vulnerable, that’s where the good stuff lies.


18



Staying calm is 90% of the battle. Practice.


13, 15, 18, 21



If it makes you happy it doesn't have to make sense to anyone else.


11, 14, 20



Make sure they have resources other than us. Hotlines for teens such as Boys Town National Hotline, National $@!#% Prevention Lifeline, etc.


12



Stage one relationship: first few dates. Stage two, you really like them. Stage three, you love them and are exclusive. Stage four: you commit to building a future together. You’re going to have many stage one and two relationships. Probably a few stage three, and if you’re lucky you’ll have one or two stage fours.


14, 17, 21



We can learn, we can evolve. Let yourself be moved by the spirit. More beauty, more service, more humanity, deeper (or questioned) faith, more love. Always more love. That’s the best I can hope for: that you live a life full of love.


21



Some things just don’t come easy. That’s the point. Practice working for what you want. Nothing is sweeter than when you accomplish something you set out to do. Go for it!


11, 14, 17, 21



Save where you can. Spend when you have to. Splurge every once in a while.


15, 21



Sometimes you’ll be in the wrong side of history. When you discover you’re wrong, move to the right side of history. When I first started training as a nurse it was the early 1990’s. HIV/$@!#% was pretty new. I remember telling my fellow student I would double glove and take any “over the top” precautions I wanted to. That was my fear and ignorance talking. Amazing how cozy self-righteousness makes you feel. I was wrong. Always look at the issue through the lens of humanity.


16, 21



Read maps.


9-14



Listen to podcast “1912” about an incident of alarming racial injustice Forsyth County GA.


12



Just because someone is an a-hole it doesn’t mean they’re wrong.


17, 21



Your very existence is a miracle. Countless cosmic events and generations of ancestors had to come together in precisely the right way at precisely the right time for you to be here now. It’s an honor to be who you are. Act accordingly.


13, 15, 18, 20, 21



Sometimes when you win, you lose. And when you lose, you win. Meaning that sometimes when you get what you want it doesn’t work out well. And sometimes wonderful things happen as a result of a failure or disappointment. Chin up. There’s a million paths to happiness and fulfillment. If one doesn’t work out your will find another.


12, 21



The opposite of depression is expression.


15



“It’s okay to be sad. It’s okay to grieve. Because you can also live your life, and love your life, and be happy too.” Excellent advice from 9/11 survivor.


12, 15, 19



Go to movie Star Wars


12



No threats, not even jokingly.


15



Plan a few screen-free weekends every year. (Reticket until 16.)


7



When you see someone in military uniform, thank them for their service. Hold the door open for them, etc. If they are behind you in line at Starbucks, pay for their coffee. At the very least, look them in the eye and smile - they’ve made a tremendous sacrifice and you should acknowledge that.


12, 16, 21



Never say anything behind someone's back that you wouldn't say to their face.


11, 14, 18



Marriage vows won’t “fix” anything about a relationship. They won’t change how a person communicates. Never start out a relationship with the hope or expectation that your partner will change (or if they are hoping you will change.)It’s not fair to either of you. Everyone deserves to be loved for who they are, not who they could be.


21



When dropping them off at a dorm, leave them with. Cookie sheet and cookie dough. Make cookies/make friends.


15, 17, 18, 19, 21



“Be brave. Be resilient. Be kind. Be grateful.” -Hillary Rodham Clinton


12



Your spouse will be absolutely unbearable roughly 10% of the time. So will you be, by the way. Give grace. Receive it too. Also, physical distance helps, even for a few hours.


21



Opioids are highly addictive. If possible, stay away from them entirely and definitely not for more than 2-3 days. Manage pain with NSAIDS or Tylenol.


16, 18, 21



Never give unsolicited advice. Instead ask “How can I best support you?”


14, 20



Instead of focusing on finding love, focus on DOING what you love. When you're thriving and in your element Love will find YOU. Besides, love isn't just about finding the right person it's about being the right person.


17-19