The mind replays what the heart wants to heal.


16



Have a yearly “review” right before school year. Raise allowance as appropriate. If they want more money, they’ll have to take on more responsibilities.


7-17



1

Give baby a banana before bed and they’ll sleep through the night. (Obviously once they’re on solid food.)


1



No matter how late you are, don’t speed or drive unsafely. It’s not worth someone’s life or limbs.


18-18, 21



I want you to remember that for the first three years of your life I couldn’t take a poop without you on my lap. So there will be no shirking hugs from Mom now that you’re a teenager. xoxo


14



When they turn 18 they should have a will, a financial power of attorney and a medical PoA.


17,18



ABC's of video game addiction: Autonomy, Belonging, Control. Try to find ways to developing these things in areas outside of gaming. Games are great, but not at the expense of everything else.


1Infant-13



1

Learn how to quiet your demons / that voice that tells you you’re not good enough. Great resource is Dan Harris’ 2022 TED talk.


14, 19, 21



I wish I had heard this in my 20’s. https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMRtFBvGr/


20



Our nervous systems are just trying to keep us safe. If you were thrown into fight/flight/fawn today, give yourself some grace.


14, 21



At the hospital? Always confirm your name and date of birth and why you’re there.


16



Tell them who they are: kind, creative, smart etc. A person of honor and integrity, a part of the divine universe. Demonstrate for them what it means to live according to your values. Encourage them to listen to their body, guide them on how they might best find (and align with) their truest nature. Listen to them when they’re exploring what that might look like. Support them when they decide.


1, 2, 5, 7, 12, 16, 18, 21



“If you can’t figure something out, figure out how to figure it out.” - Paul Graham


18



It’s your civic duty to vote (including midterms!) Be an informed voter.


16, 18



Keep going. Push yourself. The struggle makes it all the more worth it.


17, 21



Two years after Trump lost re-election I still struggle to understand how anyone could support him, to say nothing of work for him. But then it came to me: being close to power is intoxicating. It makes people feel important and accepted, which are things very few of us ever, though we all long to, feel. I recalled how very much I longed for this type of acceptance for most of my career. I *loved* being included in meetings with the CEO. I loved having a access and influence. It was so validating, so satisfying! Looking back I’m embarrassed, even ashamed about how much of a fan girl I was. (Don’t get me wrong! Ambition and drive are good things! But I was more concerned with being perceived as important than I was in substance or actual effort.) All this to say, be mindful of the lure of being in the “it” group. We all crave the acceptance and approval. There’s nothing wrong with wanting a seat at the table, just pay more attention to be table than the seat. If you had a chance to work in the Whitehouse for Donald Trump, would you? Would you trade your values for power?


15, 21



Never consent to a search. Ask if it’s required. If not, no search. If yes, ask for your lawyer.


17, 21



I’m cool with “C”s. Do good work but don’t put too much pressure yourself.


14



Watch Abby Wambach's 2018 Barnard commencement address together.


16



Alcohol is a depressant. Never drink to feel better. It will only make things hurt worse and be worse. Only drink in celebration or community. Never to numb. That sh*t is poison. Pure $@!#% juice.


18, 19, 21



ABC's of video game addiction: Autonomy, Belonging, Control. Try to find ways to developing these things in areas outside of gaming. Games are great, but not at the expense of everything else.


1Infant-13



Kindness Confidence = Popular (Be kind to everyone, paying no attention to social status, age, looks, money or disability.) Be confident: Know that you are enough. You’ll never be perfect but no one else is either. When you mess up it’s not the end of the world- laugh at yourself when possible. Learn from failures. Don’t fake interest in people or things that don’t fill you up. Be who you are! People gravitate towards kindness and confidence


12



You don’t have to go to college, but whether you do or not, I implore you to read. If you’re like me a slow reader, pace yourself but keep at it. Read bestsellers and classics. Fiction, biography, history, art, every damn thing. A big regret of my life is that I never tried to love reading as a kid. Do yourself a favor and carve out time to read every day. Even if’s it’s just a few pages. Your mind will sharpen and your heart will be full and your soul will be fed.


10, 12, 14, 15, 16, 21



I get it. It’s exhausting when they’re little. But you will never be so needed or so loved as you are during these years.


2, 3, 4



Zootopia is a good movie to illustrate what a bully is and how we should stand up to them when they are hurting or taunting other kids.


5-8



You are always responsible for how you act, no matter what you’re feeling. (Or whether you’re drunk or in any way impaired.) Hammer this point home for the next 10 years!


13



Kids who are a little different (maybe they make funny sounds, look different, or aren’t able to talk or walk very well, etc.) Remember that just because they might be different, they are never “less than.” Their feelings matter as much as yours. They like to play as much as you. Their families love them as much as your family loves you. Include them as much as you can. You could end up making a great friend!


6



Failed? Lift yourself up, or live there. You know the work you need to do, be it physical, mental, emotional or spiritual, etc. So do it. Do the work. The only bitterness in failure comes from not having the guts to get back up again.


12, 16, 18, 20, 21