Puberty is like putting a 12 year old in the pilot seat of a fighter jet. A total sh*t show at first, then better but still erratic and dramatic until they really get a feel for the speed and the pressure, the gauges, etc. They’ll learn when to question or to trust their instincts. Tell him that he’ll fly this jet for the rest of his life and it will always be dangerous because it’s an effing jet, but he will learn how to fly it expertly. He’ll do good, have fun, accomplish missions and refuel.


12



Slow down and normalize making out without it leading to anything more. Physical intimacy can mean lots of things that aren’t sex: kissing should feel safe, personal and playful. ALWAYS be respectful and never assume that just because your sweetie is into it that they want to go farther. If your goal is to “score” do it by yourself.


15, 21



You don’t have to like everyone you go to school with, or work with. You don’t even have to like your family! BUT, you have to treat everyone with respect and kindness. They are worthy of that no matter what your opinion of them may be.


15, 21



Rain, snow or sleet...Always return the shopping cart to the proper spot in the parking lot.


17



College: you’re gonna do great! You’re also probably gonna want to quit at some point during your first year. Totally normal. If you decide college isn’t for you or now isn’t the right time, okay. But give it a year if you can. You’ll thank yourself later.


17



You can’t ask someone to change who they are before you live or accept them.


12, 15, 21



Depression can look a lot like a bad attitude. Try reacting to his chronic edginess with “Sounds like you’re in pain. You can come to me about anything, any time.”


15



Look into Kano (make your own computer)


7-11



Toast your wife at every occasion.


21



No need to over communicate. Brief, simple succinct when conveying instructions or important information. Applies across the board personal/professional etc.


14, 17, 21



When you begin dating it’s all butterflies and moonbeams. Eventually you’re going to do or say something that hurts the other person and vice versa. For that matter, eventually you’ll disagree about something. It’s VERY important to consider how they handle it. Nobody is perfect, it may not be pretty but it had better be civil. If not, don’t think for a second that they will change. Get outta there.


15, 21



Never any point in arguing with drunks or fools.


17



Rock those babies to sleep as often as you can.


0, 1, 2



Sad but important fact: You’ll never be enough for some people. Never. -Chasten Buttigieg


18



The moment you lose your cool, you’ve lost.


12,13, 14, 15, 16, 21



Golf lessons. Grampa loved golf, if he were here he would have taught you himself.


9



We’re born full of love. Life is about choosing where you want to put it. -xo


15, 19, 21



Purchase book "All Are Welcome" by Alexandra Penfold to prep him for kindergarten.


5



We don’t snoop. Never read a correspondence (email, letter, text, note, etc.) that is not intended for your eyes, or listen in to a conversation that is not intended for your ears. The right to privacy is sacred. Always respect people’s privacy and set the expectation that others do the same for you.


10



One of the most difficult things in life will be to embrace difficult and unfamiliar ways in order to grow or heal. But doing so is the only way we can grow or heal. You can do hard things. Breathe deep and take it by moment if you have to.


18, 21



Help him practice having tense conversations without getting a tone of voice.


15



Live a life of dignity and joy.


14, 21



Model being a considerate person.


2-18



“Your goals will kick you in the shins and steal your lunch money.” -Jon Acuff. You have to fight back, even though some days you lose. Failure is part of the process. Keep going.


19



Let go of things that aren’t good for you. Anger, fear, prejudice, obsession, grudges, snark, etc.


16, 21



Listen to records, a whole album at a time. 2 or 3 in a row. Bring friends, eat, drink, hangout, be goofy, dance, etc.


14-18



Begin again. Whether by choice or necessity, sometimes there’s no other option.


15, 21



Your emotional energy is sacred, and there’s nothing wrong with treating it that way. If connection is what you’re looking for, save your emotional energy for those who will cherish it and share their own. - Yung Pueblo from his book “Lighter”


12, 14, 17, 21



“The next generation never learns anything from the previous one until it’s brought home like a hammer.” - Harry Truman


13, 16, 21



Police officers and members of the military put their lives on the line to protect us. Be respectful of them and thank them for their service.


9