Relationship advice: Is she interesting? You’ll spend more time with her than anyone in your life. Does she make you laugh? Will she make a good mom? Life is long. These are the things that matter.” -Paraphrased quote from Barack Obama


21



Shampoo their hair. Nice luxurious shampoo. It’s a treat. In “5 Love Languages” speak, its an act of service and physical touch.


5, 7, 9, 12



My love for you will never run out - neither will God’s love / patience run out. I will always instruct, discipline and give consequences for bad behavior- because it’s my job to teach you. But there’s nothing you could do to lose my love. Remind them daily.


5-20



That trope “everything happens for a reason” is, I think, b.s. But I absolutely agree that you can find meaning in anything good or bad.


17



Watch the news together. Local and national. Today Show has both of mornings are easier than evenings.


12, 13, 14, 15



“Open your eyes and see what you can, until they close forever.” - All the Light We Cannot See by Anthony Dorr. See the world! Learn science, appreciate art and books, meet people and be genuinely interested in them. Engage in the fight for justice, resist fascism and dictators. Share what you have and who you are. Putting up walls is a waste of time. Yes, there will be pain. But you will be able to face it with grace, grit, courage and with the love of others. Make love! But remember if they’re too drunk to drive, they’re too drunk to consent. And be sure you’re both on the same page so you can avoid misunderstandings and hurt feelings (yours and theirs). Don’t kiss and tell. Be protective but never possessive. Just be a man, you know? (man/woman/grownup human.) Be safe - $@!#% is forever.


15, 16, 17, 18, 21



I’m going to start you in Mathnasium or some other STEM (math) activity. Not because I want u to score high on your SAT but because I want You to be confident in your math skills you will use it every day and it will come in handy no matter what you choose to do for a living


7



Learn how to quiet your demons / that voice that tells you you’re not good enough. Great resource is Dan Harris’ 2022 TED talk.


14, 19, 21



When you feel like giving up, rest. But then keep going! So many good things ahead. So many people that are meant to be in your life who you haven’t met yet.


18



Pray for the courage to be yourself.


10, 13, 15, 17, 21



Uplift your friends and surround yourself with friends who uplift you. In person and online. Encourage each other to let your lights shine brightly. Never bully or steal someone’s joy.


11, 15, 18, 20



Your mother and I would never want you to sacrifice the wellbeing of your own family for us. They should always be your priority. In the years ahead, make the choices that affirm that.


21



Great reminders for how to deal with belligerent kids. https://mailchi.mp/ahaparenting/8-things-you-can-do-when-your-child-is-belligerent


4



Explore the magic of Deer Valley YMCA Camp


07-13



Paying extra for organic isn’t always worth it but I ALWAYS buy organic apples. They taste better and don’t have the pesticides, etc.


18



Read “Lighter” by Yung Pueblo. Read it every year.


17, 19, 21



Tragedy may occur in your life, but it does not need to define your life. YOU get to do that...through the choices you make. _______I know you’ll make good ones. xo


19



Watch Ken Burns’ “The US and the holocaust.”


17



When the child is feeling upset or out of control, that is not the time to teach a lesson. Share your calm, be a safe place for them. When they’re feeling better, THEN teach the lesson.


1, 2, 3, 4



Change always brings feelings of unease. It’s easy to confuse that feeling of unease with the feeling that something must be wrong. Give yourself time to adjust before deciding if a new thing is bad..


14, 18, 21



Connect with people however you can, in whatever way feels natural to you: Talk, listen, perform, compete, create, laugh, pray, explore, share your truth, acknowledge the divine in yourself and in everyone you meet.


16, 21



It’s hard to accept that the world can be so cruel and unfair, but sometimes accepting it and focusing on what part of it you CAN change is - I’ve learned - the key.


15



Read The Lion, The Witch and the Wardrobe together.


8



Mom’s scrambled eggs: Use fresh eggs. Scramble vigorously. Don’t add water or milk, just cook in copious amount of butter. Add salt and pepper.


12



On September 11th I was at work in Fairfax VA. News reports were saying a plane was headed to the Capitol, that the Whitehouse had been hit. In the immediate aftermath of a big event, news reports will be unreliable. Wait until the facts are in. Several of the nurses had husbands who worked at the Pentagon. One of the doctors was married to a U.S. Senator in her office on the Hill. It was surreal, but no one panicked. I remember we all burst into tears when my friend’s husband called saying he was safe. So relieved.


15, 17



Go for walks together as a family before or after dinner. Sometimes we go for distance, sometimes we call them "safaris" and look for as many living creatures as we can find.


4



Make an album Or Shutterfly book about Mom and Dad’s wedding and marriage. Stress themes of love, kindness, sacrifice, shared values and putting the other first. Talk about managing conflict in a loving relationship doesn’t mean never fighting but it does mean fighting fair. Make it an annual tradition to read through it and talk about marriage on their anniversary. (The next best thing to modeling a happy marriage.


9



When you’re at home in your own skin you invite people to be at home in theirs too.


14, 20



Google the “tea metaphor” for a discussion about consent.


17



Read at least one biography every semester. between winners and losers read about the failures read about the great men and women read about historical figures American icon stage and film to battlefields to business read all about how great men and women made themselves great and learn from them here are a few to start Ted Kennedy he gets north star am Kristin Chenoweth Tina Fey I’m reading one now on call baker from the Bush administration Barack Obama Jimmy Carter Ronald Reagan Kennedy Roosevelt all those guys as well as Michelle Obama Jackie Kennedy all of those. Draft


19