Things are rarely perfect, but things that are less-than-ideal aren't all bad to the same degree. Let's talk about making buckets for "not ideal but I can put up with it" and "deal-breaker." Works for all kinds of situations. Another variation of this is to grade the suckiness of a situation on a scale of 1-10. Have them decide at what point action is needed vs. just putting up with it. This one works well for hunger. Yes, you're hungry, but on a scale of 1-10, how hungry? It also works for relationships! There are plenty of things about a spouse that are less than ideal, but how many are true deal-breakers? Teach them to understand the difference.


5, 21



“It’s alright to be yourself. There ARE people in this world who will love you.” -Fred Rogers


12, 14, 17, 21



Commonly misspelled words - find tricks for remembering. Example desert vs dessert. “Dessert” has an extra “s” for sugar. Search for mnemonics.


11



Stuff will happen and you’ll think “I can’t get through this. I can’t go on.” In the moment it really feels that way. But ...You will survive. You’ll find a way. Never give up on yourself. I never will.


17



Sometimes it feels really good to say “no.” (Or “no thank you.” Or “$@!#% no!”)


14, 20



Jumper cables 101


14



If you want to know what a woman wants in a man, I have a simple answer for you: watch the movie Scent of a Woman starring Al Pacino. Specifically, the tango scene.


14, 17, 21



“Great minds discuss ideas. Average minds discuss events. Small minds discuss people.” - Eleanor Roosevelt


13, 19



Do what makes you happy. But what if you’re not sure what that might be? If you’re at a crossroads and you don’t know where you *want* to go, just go where you’re *needed.* That’s a good first step. Trust the Lord to take it from there.


18



Read Admiral William McRaven’s autobiography Sea Stories.


17



White privilege doesn’t mean that your life hasn’t been hard, it means that your skin color isn’t one of the things making it harder.


14



Avoid the tendency to obsess over someone. It’s not romantic, it’s self-destructive. You’re worth more than that.


13, 15, 17, 19, 21



Be mindful of privilege. Discuss the concept, point it out where you see it.


11-18



1

Surprise! You’re not perfect. No one is. Do your best, but don’t expect perfection from yourself or any other human, young or old. Have compassion...We’re all in this together and we need each other to be kind and encouraging.


17, 21



Practice staying calm under pressure. The pop-up game “Perfection” is a fun way.


10, 12, 15, 17, 21



Don’t ask for anything until you’ve done what has been asked of you.


5



Start saving for retirement with your very first paycheck. Put away the MAX, you’ll never miss it. If the company doesn’t offer 401k then we’ll open a Roth IRA.


18



Read Harry Potter series to him / with him.


9-10



Attend a school board meeting or some sort of government meeting. Attend / participate.


13



Make a pound of ground beef go further by adding chopped cabbage or mushrooms.


19



Glennon Doyle described a conversation about explaining to a child what "sexy" means: “I think most people are confused about what 'sexy' means. Sexy is a grown-up word to describe a person who’s confident that she is already exactly who she was made to be. A sexy woman knows herself and she likes the way she looks, thinks, and feels. She doesn’t try to change to match anybody else. “And she knows how to use her words to tell people she trusts about what’s going on inside of her. When she’s angry, she expresses her anger in healthy ways. When she’s joyful, she does the same thing. “She doesn’t hide her true self because she’s not ashamed. She knows she’s just human—exactly how God made her and that’s good enough. She’s brave enough to be honest and kind enough to accept others when they’re honest. When two people are sexy enough to be brave and kind with each other, that’s love." (The quote is longer, Google to find the whole thing. Wise words on a tough subject.)


8



One of my favorite things is the smell of celery and onion being sautéed in butter. It’s the smell I woke up to on so many Thanksgiving mornings as my mom was making the stuffing.


21



When it comes to clothes and makeup, women have one dress code: whatever the f*ck they want. Hijab or bikini, it’s not women’s job to appeal to men. It’s not women’s job to keep men’s appetites subdued.


14, 17, 21



Replace “but” with “and.” “I love you but...” Becomes “I love you and that’s why...” etc.


9



When it comes to judging your behavior at school/ sports/ work, ask: Was I fair? Was I kind? Did I put in the work? If the answers are all “Yes,” then rest well. If an answer is “No,” then fix it.


16



Consensual sex requires no persuasion, convincing or begging.


14, 17



Take advantage of all the help that’s available to you! Counselors, advisors, mentors, etc. Then pay it forward when you’re in a position to do so.


17



Seek / Accept job offers that teach you something valuable. Now isn’t the time in your life to worry about the money or status. Get experience! Have fun, learn, grow, challenge yourself and try new things.


15-20



Teen years are a whole other ballgame. Find a community and stay up with trends and news. Check out the website Raising Teens Today.


12



Remember what a teenaged sh*t you were before throwing in the towel on the next generation. We’re all self-centered, entitled and oblivious when we’re young. The goal is that they don’t *stay* that way. Be the parent they need, and they’ll listen. It may take a year or twenty, but they’ll see the light if you just pour love into them.


12-21