No threats, not even jokingly.


15



Sometimes you’ll be in the wrong side of history. When you discover you’re wrong, move to the right side of history. When I first started training as a nurse it was the early 1990’s. HIV/$@!#% was pretty new. I remember telling my fellow student I would double glove and take any “over the top” precautions I wanted to. That was my fear and ignorance talking. Amazing how cozy self-righteousness makes you feel. I was wrong. Always look at the issue through the lens of humanity.


16, 21



Consider what you value. Act accordingly.


10, 14, 17, 20



Remind them they’re safe to feel whatever they’re feeling.


2, 12, 21



Be mindful of privilege. Discuss the concept, point it out where you see it.


11-18



1

Imagine hearing the apology you need to hear. Often times that really helps, even if the person never actually says it. It makes it easier to forgive and move on.


18



Read up on the adolescent brain.


11, 13



Sometimes I think the best way to take care of them is to teach them to take care of others: Littler kids, sick or disabled, those who’ve been left out.


5-7



“The Greatest Generation” by Tom Brokaw Listen to audio or read together


14



You’re not obsessed with that person you’re just hyper fixating. It’s ADHD.


12, 16, 19, 21



Try not to confuse excess with quality. It’s okay not to have the biggest house on the block. It’s okay not to drive the fanciest car.


21



You are absolutely priceless. What someone thinks of you, whatever may happen to you, no matter who loves you (or rejects you), nothing can diminish your worth or your worthiness. You. Are. Priceless.


10, 14, 17



There is an expression “God only gives you what you can handle.” I think that’s backwards. I think that God gives you the grace you need to handle whatever comes your way. He is faithful and generous. I think that’s what “Be not afraid” means.


17



Notre Dame Lullabies by the O’Neil Brothers is my favorite album ever. I used to play it at your bedtime when u were a baby and even sometimes when you were a kid. It reminds me of the happiest time of my life, when you came into it. Play it for me when I’m old and gray, okay?


21



Read the Hobbit aloud with him. Afterward, encourage him to read The Lord of the Rings by himself.


9



Worst thing in the world is spending your life with the wrong person.


21



Change “I need to” to “this matters because”. Instead of “I need to walk the dog” say “it matters that I walk the dog because he needs exercise and to check p-mail.” (Helps!)


8, 11, 16, 21



Look into Rustic Pathways to see the world and do some good.


15



If you feel like you can’t get your act together, that you’re less mature than some others your age, I have the recipe for being a grown up: Read, travel, help those in need. READ everything you can get your hands on: books, audio books, newspapers, etc. Travel to places that are different than your experience. Keep a lookout for people (or animals, or groups or causes, etc) who are struggling. HELP those in need.


12, 14, 16, 19, 21



It matters more “how” you go to college than “where” you go to college.


16



In 2024 there’s a medical test to screen for cancer that involves collecting one’s poo and sending it off to the lab. They just called me to tell me they canceled my test due to a clerical error on the order. I was so mad. The thought of doing that poo test again was freaking me out. Why didn’t the flunky who handles the specimens call before they pitched it? Then it dawned on me: it’s someone’s *job* to process poo specimens. Probably hundreds a day. It’s okay they didn’t stop to call and straighten out my test.perspective!!


17, 21



Quoting Sarah Bessel: “One of the best things Jen Hatmaker has taught me about raising big kids: if they get on the roller coaster of Big Emotions, my main first job is to stay on the platform. I am NOT to get in the car and ride up


12



Let's find little ways to practice self-control and build that muscle.


11



1

Talk about how choices become habits. Habits can become addictions. Describe how pathways are literally dug into the brain and it's very hard to change them once those paths are made.


13-16



2

Encourage others!!!


13



My favorite actor was Robin Williams.


19



Anything you deny or fight will fight you back harder. Don’t fight the fear, pain, disappointment, etc. Let it in and let it teach you what it wants to teach you. Then you can part as friends.


15, 21



“I can be changed by what happens to me. But I refuse to be reduced by it.” - Maya Angelou


12, 15, 21



Be discerning about your sources of information. Some red flags: Too good to be true. Get rich quick. Chosen race. Any race or group blamed for societal problems. Fear of change. Threats of real or metaphysical harm (I.e. $@!#%) or bribes with reward.


12, 14, 16. 18, 21



Don’t let someone have to tell you twice that they don’t want you. Nothing good comes from hanging on after that.


15, 21