I want you to remember that for the first three years of your life I couldn’t take a poop without you on my lap. So there will be no shirking hugs from Mom now that you’re a teenager. xoxo
14
Mom’s scrambled eggs: Use fresh eggs. Scramble vigorously. Don’t add water or milk, just cook in copious amount of butter. Add salt and pepper.
12
Don’t be a mooch! Contribute: To your home, your relationships, your work, your community, your church, your country, the world. Think about how much you get from all these things. It’s so much more from all these things than you could ever pay back, but that doesn’t mean you don’t try. Dig in and contribute wherever you can. Never free-load. That’s not who we are. Be brave and contribute your talent, treasure or whatever you can. Duty and compassion both demand it.
11-18
Grandpa was a Marine, though you’d never know it. Slight in build and oh-so gentle natured. But underneath he had a good bit of grit. He never complained. He once told me “You can stand any amount of pain for a little while.” (Basically saying suck it up and hang in there until help arrives.) I’ve never forgotten it.
18
Check out the Jesuit Volunteer Corp. A short but deeply meaningful immersion into service, faith in action, selflessness and living on a lot less than you think you need.
19
Find one or two scary documentaries on the dangers of gambling. Watch together. Betting on sports is a big thing in some schools and I want to scare the $@!#% out of him about how bad gambling can screw up his life. Check online tools from gamblers anonymous.
15
People are insecure. Be mindful of fragile egos (we all have them to a degree.) Avoid implying that people aren't doing a good job.
20
"Discipline is helping a child solve a problem. Punishment is making a child suffer for having a problem. To raise problem solvers, focus on solutions, not retribution.”- L.R KNost
2-15
The only thing that matters is love. When we live with love - for God, for others and ourselves, that is what makes life worth living.
16
Journal! I forget who said it but it’s so true: we don’t know how we think until we see what we say. Talking into a voice memo app or writing in a journal will help you process and grow.
13, 15, 19, 21
Set up a dog agility course in the backyard. Use household items or toys, etc and lots of dog treats for training.
8
Make an album Or Shutterfly book about Mom and Dad’s wedding and marriage. Stress themes of love, kindness, sacrifice, shared values and putting the other first. Talk about managing conflict in a loving relationship doesn’t mean never fighting but it does mean fighting fair. Make it an annual tradition to read through it and talk about marriage on their anniversary. (The next best thing to modeling a happy marriage.
9
Get book “Talk to Me First: Everything You Need to Know to Become Your Kids'Go-To Person about Sex.” by Deborah Roffman.
7
Happiness: Someone (or some creature) to love, something to do and something to hope for. Don’t get too caught up in the rat race, money doesn’t mean you’ve arrived.
20
Surprise! You’re not perfect. No one is. Do your best, but don’t expect perfection from yourself or any other human, young or old. Have compassion...We’re all in this together and we need each other to be kind and encouraging.
17, 21
Even when something’s not the right fit (job interview, blind date, audition, etc.) you’re still making connections. You never know what could happen, so stay engaged and be yourself. Maybe that blind date who’s not into you has a friend who might be. Maybe that casting director will call you for a totally different role. Chin up! Ride the positive vibes you put out into the universe.
12,18, 21
Forget perfection. Nothing is perfect. No relationship, job, house, or day is perfect. Let go of expectations, be open to the mess.
18
If you don’t have anything intelligent to say on a subject it’s fine (encouraged) to say nothing. Listen. Learn.
20
I don’t remember much about my grandmother (Marie) but I recall her hands. Her ring fingers had a funny curve to them, bowed in a little at the top. My ring fingers do the same thing. I think of her every time I notice it.
19