Sometimes big stuff happens. Big good, big bad, big change. It will take some time to adjust. Maybe a month, a season, a semester or maybe a year or longer. Gear up. Psych yourself up for a difficult day/month/year. You can do this. Stay present, don’t get ahead of yourself or get bogged down in what’s done. “What if?” and “if-only’s” are not your friends. Be good to yourself and be good to others. Rest, nourish, create, have fun and keep the faith.
15, 21
Sometimes grief looks a lot like anger. Are you upset about something you lost or had to let go of?
15, 21
Check out from the library or Amazon: “My First Money Book: A Guide for Parents and Children to Saving, Spending, Sharing, and Investing Your Money” by Reggie Nelson
8
Great article on making math fun: https://www.washingtonpost.com/lifestyle/how-to-get-reluctant-children-to-embrace-math/2014/03/04/4be99e46-959d-11e3-8461-8a24c7bf0653_story.html
6
Give books. Inscribe them. Just a line or two can turn a good book into a treasure. Great for any occasion.
17
“Things are not perfect, because life is not TV and we are real people with scarred, worried hearts. But it’s amazing a lot of the time.” - Anne Lamott
14
Major life events such as the birth of a baby, graduations, new job, (lost job) are a big deal. Make a fuss. Take an interest in loved ones’ experiences. Acknowledge their feelings. Express a sincere interest in others (young and old) will profoundly affect your relationships.
15, 19
Keep difficult conversations brief. Under ten minutes then table it so everyone can process.
13, 14, 16. 19, 21
People may have all kinds of different motives for doing what they do, saying what they say. To “give someone the benefit of the doubt” means that you consider what the best possible reason they may have for doing what they did and assume that was the motive. If someone has earned your trust, even if it’s that they’ve done nothing to break your trust, give them the benefit of the doubt.
11-15
Work Hard. Do your best. Keep your word. Never get too big for your britches. Trust in God. Have no fear
15, 21
Maria Shriver has lots of great parenting advice. One of my favorites is (paraphrased): “Children need what you need: to be seen, to be talked to, to feel safe and loved.”
Infant
Make yourself a good hand. Don't wait to be asked, just jump in when you see a need. Wash a dish, make a bed, change a tire, help out a friend or a stranger whenever you can.
14-20
Happiness: Someone (or some creature) to love, something to do and something to hope for. Don’t get too caught up in the rat race, money doesn’t mean you’ve arrived.
20
Change “I need to” to “this matters because”. Instead of “I need to walk the dog” say “it matters that I walk the dog because he needs exercise and to check p-mail.” (Helps!)
8, 11, 16, 21
When you’re ready to grow up, (or when you have to even though you might not be ready) … Accept your responsibilities, gifts, and challenges with an unflinching honesty, with humility and dignity. Resolve to do good and to stay true to yourself. Remember the light inside you and look for the light in others. Be kind. Have fun! Know that you’re loved… So much.
15, 18, 21
Have them practice making trade offs based on their financial priorities. For example: Pedicure or movie?
9
Dress to people will listen to you, not look at you. (This is especially true at school and work.)
15, 18, 21
Make a deal: flying lessons IF he takes dancing lessons. A man has got to know how to dance! In fact, tack on some other prerequisites like good grades and responsible behavior
16
Let your toddler brush your teeth. Goes a long way to them letting you brush theirs and it gives them a sense of autonomy and control.
2,3,4
You will never be good enough for the wrong person. This truth is profound and one I wish I learned a lot earlier in my life. Stop tripping over yourself to please someone who doesn’t get you.
21
Begin planning trip for 10th bday. Maybe to Atlantis in Bahamas or someplace he’d be excited about._____Get him involved in planning and saving.
8
If you want to know what girls like, read the books they’re reading, watch the shows they watch, etc. Porn is entertainment *not* education. Movies books and shows marketed to 12 year-old boys get it wrong most of the time, can’t learn anything from them. Chick flicks is where you’ll find a little instruction on how to flirt in a non-creepy way, how to kiss, how to be in a healthy relationship. Study the difference between the male gaze vs female gaze.
14
Sometimes you can be so angry you don’t know what to do with yourself. It’s like being forced to keep your hand on a hot stove, trying to get through one minute at a time, one even one breath at a time. But there’s no need to white-knuckle it. The rage you feel is demanding to be acknowledged and validated. It needs to be processed, not ignored, stuffed down inside. A short list of some outlets for rage that’s begging to be heard are: art, music, physical activity, time in nature, anything creative or expressive. Baking, writing, improv, storytelling, stand up. Maybe try challenging yourself to do something difficult, something doable but you would have never thought you could do, like run a marathon, etc. Literally talk to the rage. Name it. Is it male or female? Young or old? Is it human or animal or alien, etc? Giving Rage a name, say for example Helen. Helen is a straight-up terrifying 8th grader. She has a few things she’d like to unload about. Dialog it in your head. And when you’ve heard her out, Helen will leave peacefully, if not painlessly. What do you do with yourself when the rage is gone? Give yourself permission to start over. Always remember I love you. xoxo
14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 21