When you meet someone for the first time try to clear your mind of any assumptions about physical appearance. Race, gender, age, handicap/disability, etc.


17, 21



Know the difference between an inconvenience and a tragedy. Hint: If it can be fixed with money or effort, it’s probably not a tragedy.


15, 20



Just do the next right thing. One step at a time, you’ll get there.


13, 18, 21



Be generous in all things. That is my hope for you.


14, 18, 21



1

The Paradoxical Commandments by Keith Kent: 1. People are illogical, unreasonable, and self-centred. Love them anyway. 2. If you do good, people will accuse you of selfish ulterior motives. Do good anyway. 3. If you are successful, you win false friends and true enemies. Succeed anyway. 4. The good you do today will be forgotten tomorrow. Do good anyway. 5. Honesty and frankness make you vulnerable. Be honest and frank anyway. 6. The biggest men and women with the biggest ideas can be shot down by the smallest men and women with the smallest minds. Think big anyway. 7. People favour underdogs but follow only top dogs. Fight for a few underdogs anyway. 8. What you spend years building may be destroyed overnight. Build anyway. 9. People really need help but may attack you if you do help them. Help people anyway. 10. Give the world the best you have and you’ll get kicked in the teeth. Give the world the best you have anyway.


14, 17, 21



For a bad cut / gash, use a rolled up washcloth or hand towel to apply pressure until you can get to an ER. If you have to drive yourself or need your hands free, secure the towel in place with duct tape.


18



Always have a 5 year plan. Be thinking of goals you want to work towards, however big or small. What inspires you? What drives you? What do you want to accomplish or cure or solve?


15, 17, 21



A wise friend once told me that the kids will do as well as you do. You can’t be a good parent if you’re a miserable person. Do what you need to do to stay healthy and sane.


1, 5, 15, 21



Ask them to think of foods that taste good and also foods that make them feel good. Involve them in lunchbox decisions, dinner planning and prep, etc. so they’re empowered by their food habits.


6-9



“You will use up everything you got trying to give people what they want.” —- Nina Simone


17



YouTube Hank Green “Study Hall.” It talks about navigating the mess of college and career choices, like choosing a major (and what a major is!) What interests align with which majors, etc.


12, 15, 16



Look into Kano (make your own computer)


7-11



Check out Long Lake Summer Camp in NY. Theater, the arts, etc.


12, 13, 14, 15, 16



Respect people’s privacy. No snooping, eavesdropping, peeping, etc.


11



Forget perfection. Nothing is perfect. No relationship, job, house, or day is perfect. Let go of expectations, be open to the mess.


18



Teach tuck to drive


15



Time is of the essence


16



I like to say a Hail Mary just to join the chorus, to add my voice to the millions who are praying in that moment. The world has plenty of people thinking or doing horrible things, we need to add to the good, add to the beauty as much as possible at every turn. Saying a quick prayer is sometimes all I can muster.


9-19



When you feel like you’re on fire with anger or fear, if you can’t shake it, put that fire to good use.


14



Control isn’t safety. Safety is putting in the physical/mental/intellectual/emotional/spiritual work so you’re confident in your ability to address whatever comes your way and thrive, bounce back after getting knocked down.


14, 21



Sit down together and write house rules on anger. We don’t hit or bite. Do we yell and slam doors? Name-call? Say “I don’t love you” ? Bad words? What’s appropriate anger and what’s unacceptable?


4-6



Practice not putting stuff off. If it takes 10 seconds or less do it now. Then move up to 30 seconds or less. Keep going up to ~3 minutes. Good example is putting away laundry or emptying dishwasher, etc.


15



You always have a choice. Always.


15, 19, 21



The things we invite to protect us take their job seriously. They will not abandon the watch without a fight to the death. So be careful, very careful about what u invite as armor. Please don’t place your trust in drugs, alcohol, food, gambling, working, disconnecting, etc. Put your trust in that which is creative, honest, loving, beautiful, interesting, inspiring, challenging or peaceful. These things make much better bodyguards, and they will never turn on you.


13, 16, 20



Sometimes I think the best way to take care of them is to teach them to take care of others: Littler kids, sick or disabled, those who’ve been left out.


5-7, 1Infant-12



A person is only as good as how they treat you when they are angry with you.


17



Someone else’s success doesn’t subtract from yours. Celebrating with them and encouraging them won’t make you the loser and them the winner. We’re all in this together.


12, 15



You don’t have to choose to be single forever to enjoy being single for now.


17, 21