I would rather deal with a big truth than a little lie. Whatever it is you’re going through we can solve it together but only if we’re both honest.
14
Difficult conversations: Break-ups, layoffs, etc. happen. Practice delivering bad news and getting bad news.
15-21
Institute a “Wall of Fame” for accomplishments and victories, big and small. AND a “Wall of Shame” for minor infractions such as not changing the toilet paper roll, etc. We have to be willing to put ourselves on the wall of shame too - and that’s the lesson: We all make mistakes but we own up to them, fix them if possible and learn from them always. Also good fun. Start our with actual paper version but transition to a shared iCloud album to post wall of shame pics once they are old enough for phones. Maybe even continue through adulthood if they “shame” themselves!
5-15, 18, 21
“It’s not as important how a message is received compared to how it is sent.” Sometimes you have to have uncomfortable conversations but the can always be kind and loving. Sometimes your message won’t land well, but if you expressed yourself truthfully and kindly, that’s not your burden to bear.
16
Find what you love Do what you love Be what you love Live what you love Love what you love and never look back ... Except to love.
19
My biggest regret is wasting my energy on people who didn’t think much of me. You can’t make someone love you. It’s a mystery what brings people together. You didn’t do anything wrong, you just need to let go and spend your light on people who bask in it.
17
The app "Bark" detects messaging containing cyber-bullying, sexting, signs of depression or suicidal thoughts, etc.
11
Awesome game we did at preschool - play I SPY. Try with objects or emotions, such as "I spy something sad" or "I spy something joyful." To help him learn empathy.
3-5
People pretend to enjoy all sorts of things. Don’t assume you’re the only one who thinks drinking to the point of getting sick is just stupid.
15
In social situations it's better to talk too little than too much. Don't over-share with people you're not close to.
15
Be on the lookout for people who are not included and reach out. There was a girl in my 8th grade class who was pregnant. Nobody talked to her, including me. Looking back, I regret that deeply. How scared and alone she must have been. She could have used a friend. I wish I would have asked her to sit by me at lunch or talked to her about homework or something.
11-13
Enroll in cooking lessons. We'll need to find you someone who knows how to cook. (Don't tell mom I said that.)
14
Use timers to motivate and structure. "Better have your jammies on and teeth brushed by the time the timer goes off!" Using a simple timer helps things not drag on and on.
2-5
No matter how smart you are or how much you know, you still don’t know everything. ALWAYS be willing to learn and to change your position when faced with new information or perspective.
15, 20
I don’t buy Mallomars. But Santa does. Another Christmas stocking tradition is chicken flickin. Rubber chickens you shoot like rubber bands.
5, 21
Go for walks together as a family before or after dinner. Sometimes we go for distance, sometimes we call them "safaris" and look for as many living creatures as we can find.
4
I did my best to guide you, but I’m sure there are many areas where my take is just not aligned with yours. That’s okay! Bunny please don’t feel any obligation to believe what I believe or take any advice, or continue any tradition mentioned in this Coda.
21