Follow your dreams…not your boyfriend’s.


16



Sex talk: “Forget about sex. Just play first.” Forget about making a move and just have fun. Dance, listen to music together, go somewhere exciting, look at something beautiful, read to each other, play sports, let yourself be seen and encourage them to do the same. Communicate in a hundred ways: talk/send texts/ post on social media, pass notes, whatever. “Sex isn’t the door to intimacy


15



Grandpa never wore a watch. (This was way before cell phones existed.) Still, he always knew what time it was, and he was never, ever late.


14



Resentment is a sign you are giving too much and are in need of replenishment. It’s a good example of how even the “negative” emotions are on your side, interpreting your experience in the world.


16, 18, 21



Eat at a local restaurant tonight. Get the cream sauce. Have a cold pint at 4 o’clock in a mostly empty bar. Go somewhere you’ve never been. Listen to someone you think may have nothing in common with you. Order the steak rare. Eat an oyster. Have a Negroni. Have two. Be open to a world where you may not understand or agree with the person next to you, but have a drink with them anyways. Eat slowly. Tip your server. Check in on your friends. Check in on yourself. Enjoy the ride." - Anthony Bourdain


18, 21



You’ll miss me when I’m gone, but if I did my job right you won’t need me.


21



Teach tuck to drive


15



Re-Read "Girls and Sex: Navigating the New Landscape" by Peggy Orenstein.


13



Be ready to learn from around you. Curiosity = adventure. And when you’re curious, there’s no room for judgment.


17



I stopped worrying about you by the time you were seven. (I’m not talking about your safety and health, that I’ll always worry about!) But I knew you were a joyful, generous, kind, smart and well-mannered person. You were a great friend, supportive and fun. You would be a good partner, and would contribute so much good to society. I could see you had a curious mind, an active imagination and more than a healthy dose of courage.


15, 21



Summer concerts at Wolftrap- get good seats so they can really get a sense of the experience.


13-16



You are not your thoughts. Focus more on your choices / actions.


17



One of my favorite scenes in a movie is James Bond with Pierce Brosnan. Bullets are whizzing by him and he just so of gives a mildly annoyed look while focusing on what he’s doing. It’s quintessential cool.


15, 21



Remember Mom's birthday


2-21



Defending yourself from a bear: NEVER run from or turn your back on a bear. Remember the rhyme: “If it’s black, fight back. If it’s brown hit the ground, if it’s white like Similac, frozen bear gonna send u back.” - Mamadou Ndiaye


16



“It takes about 20 years to build a reputation and 5 minutes to ruin it. If you think about that, you’ll do things differently.” - Warren Buffett


12, 14, 16, 19, 21



Make a separate piggie bank together for money to donate. Talk about how we manage what we have thoughtfully: Save some, spend some, donate some.


5-8



There is an expression “God only gives you what you can handle.” I think that’s backwards. I think that God gives you the grace you need to handle whatever comes your way. He is faithful and generous. I think that’s what “Be not afraid” means.


17



Choose to love despite the rage. See poem by Lucas Jones “ I Will Teach My Sons to be Dangerous Men.”


12, 14, 16, 19, 21



Just remember sometimes you’re there for a good time but not a long time. Not every relationship (job, journey, experience) is meant to be permanent.)


15, 19, 21



For a bad cut / gash, use a rolled up washcloth or hand towel to apply pressure until you can get to an ER. If you have to drive yourself or need your hands free, secure the towel in place with duct tape.


18



Teach how to carve a turkey.


15



If you’re unable to help someone, help someone else. Throw some goodness or beauty in the bucket of humanity.


16



Always clean from clean to dirty. Wash glassware first, greasy dishes last. Sink and tub first, then toilet. Then floor. Top-to bottom is another general rule.


13, 18



I did my best to guide you, but I’m sure there are many areas where my take is just not aligned with yours. That’s okay! Bunny please don’t feel any obligation to believe what I believe or take any advice, or continue any tradition mentioned in this Coda.


21



A simple trick to calm your nerves: Name 5 things you can hear right now.


5-15



When you’re at home in your own skin you invite people to be at home in theirs too.


14, 20