Rock those babies to sleep as often as you can.


0, 1, 2



Healing doesn’t mean becoming the best version of yourself. It’s learning to love even the worst parts about yourself.


17, 21



“You’ll never be alone when you carry a poet in your pocket.” - John Adams Bring a book with you wherever you go.


12, 19



It’s hard to know how to support a friend who is grieving, but it’s a priceless skill / attribute. Some people just are naturally know what to say, but for the rest of us, it can be learned. If you don’t know what to say, just stay silent but be present. Or try something like “I’m so sorry.” Be mindful not to turn away because their pain makes you uncomfortable. Send a text just “thinking of you.” Grief takes a lot of energy and focus, and there’s not much you can (or should) do to help someone process their pain. So lessen their burden by taking some of the stupid everyday life stuff off their plate: Walk the dog, make a meal, make sure there’s food, clean clothes, toilet paper, etc. Help with school or work stuff if possible. Check in often but take your queue from them. Some people want company while others want solitude. Everyone processes pain and grief differently. Don’t force your way on them. Offer to look at pictures or hear stories about the person they lost. This time is about them, so avoid any comparisons with how what they’re going through is similar to something you or someone else went through, unless it was the exact same thing: Telling someone who lost a child that you understand their pain because your grandmother died last year is not okay. People mean well but they say really stupid sh*t sometimes. (If you ever say something that may have caused pain, just acknowledge it, apologize for it, and move on from it.)There are lots of resources. Grief is so isolating. You can’t make their pain go away, but that’s okay. You’re job isn’t to ‘cheer them up’ it’s to ‘keep showing up.’ Read up on current literature, there are tons of great resources.


19



When you’re tired, the next best thing to sleep is a shower.


16



Avoid the tendency to obsess over someone. It’s not romantic, it’s self-destructive. You’re worth more than that.


13, 15, 17, 19, 21



Be willing to say “I don’t know” if you don’t know! Don’t just make stuff up.


15, 20



Being well-read is better (and cheaper) than an advanced degree, especially for broader education. Stay curious and read!! Fiction, non-fiction, biographies ...


15, 18, 21



Protect women from gross men: First, don’t be gross. Second, resist the urge to go along with the pack when they get gross. Third, and this is going to take courage, tell them to knock that sh*t off. Never make a girl feel uncomfortable to get a laugh. It’s not funny, it’s scary and demeaning and will teach her you can’t be trusted.


10, 14, 17, 21



Your great-great grandmother was a seamstress at Marshall Fields. Her husband was a firefighter in Chicago. The immigrated from County Wexford in Ireland.


10



Be open to the possibility that you might be wrong.


12, 14, 17, 21



Bedtime often goes to sh*t in a hurry because kids are tired and parents are out of patience. Be kind. If your kids are anything like you, they’ll need extra tenderness at bedtime: cuddles, soft words, prayers. Forgiveness for the ridiculous tantrums over silly stuff. Take pity on them, their little bodies are tired and they haven’t learned how to function on empty.


1-4



Sometimes it just takes a while to catch on. I had to watch Game of thrones 3 or 4 times before I could keep track of all the characters and subplots. Record your lectures so you can replay them a few times.


13,15,19



"Love is nothing more and nothing less than relentlessly showing up for your people." - Glennon Doyle


18-21



Ask the question “What are you doing when you feel most like yourself?”


16



Life is for the living. It’s okay to move on. It’s okay to laugh and dream, work, to party, to rest rest, etc. you honor the dead by living your life. Everyone meets up in the end anyway!


19, 21



“Where you stand depends on where you sit.” It means your personal situation informs your stance on issues. Try to imagine how you’d vote if you were sitting at a less privileged place.


15, 21



Educate About Risks of Driving


12-15



No need to over communicate. Brief, simple succinct when conveying instructions or important information. Applies across the board personal/professional etc.


14, 17, 21



Sometimes you’ll be in the wrong side of history. When you discover you’re wrong, move to the right side of history. When I first started training as a nurse it was the early 1990’s. HIV/$@!#% was pretty new. I remember telling my fellow student I would double glove and take any “over the top” precautions I wanted to. That was my fear and ignorance talking. Amazing how cozy self-righteousness makes you feel. I was wrong. Always look at the issue through the lens of humanity.


16, 21



Look for answers where truth, laughter, kindness, beauty, compassion and love are found. (Not in outward appearances or illusions of perfection. Not in cynicism, apathy or destructiveness.)


10, 13, 16, 19, 21



Con-men (or women) appear perfect. They are good-looking, kind, flattering, etc. Most people are good. But be careful of those who seem to be too good.


15



Don’t ask for anything until you’ve done what has been asked of you.


5



Spend 20 minutes a day watching a show you like in Spanish (or whatever your target language is) with reactionary subtitles. You’ll pick it up in no time!


13, 16, 19



Read Just Mercy by Bryan Stevenson together.


17



Be generous in all things. That is my hope for you.


14, 18, 21



Remind them they’re safe to feel whatever they’re feeling.


2, 12, 21



When setting off fireworks...Keep a hose or a bucket of water nearby. Also remember Costco is a great place to buy them!


5, 7, 9



Following your conscience is more important than getting ahead and will make a greater difference in how happy you are. Getting ahead or not isn’t entirely up to you, but listening to your conscience is.” - Senator Mitt Romney (paraphrase)


16