When COVID started my first thought was “Holy sh*t Trump is going to cancel the 2020 election because of pandemic.” Thank God I was wrong.


15



One of the most difficult things in life will be to embrace difficult and unfamiliar ways in order to grow or heal. But doing so is the only way we can grow or heal. You can do hard things. Breathe deep and take it by moment if you have to.


18, 21



I’ve been trying to retrain my brain to deal with anxiety in healthy ways. It’s SO hard when these connections were fused decades ago. BUT I REFUSE to be a party to YOU laying down those same unhealthy neurological pathways. I’ll teach you better ways to handle stress and anxiety. Exercise/ Music/ warm showers/ creativity/ rest/ journaling/ meditation... WHATEVER! I promise to Somehow teach you what I never learned.


5-10, 14



Like me, you turn to food for comfort. That’s okay to a point, but it won’t help. That hole you’re trying to fill will just get deeper. So if you can’t or won’t stop eating for comfort please consider this suggestion: Do something creative first. Sing, write, paint, run, lift, act, improv, whatever. The hole will be so much more shallow when you go to try and fill it with food. Hopefully, eventually you’ll get to the point of staying in “creative mode” to feel better.


10, 12, 13, 16, 21



What do you think about the word “refugee?” Let’s talk about what it means. Personally, I don’t understand all the complexities of immigration policy, but I figure anyone who escapes violence and walks hundreds of miles with kids in tow, trying to get to safety and gain an opportunity for a better life for their family can live next-door to me anytime.


13



Attend a school board meeting or some sort of government meeting. Attend / participate.


13



Put your purse, (wallet,bag, phone, or shoe) in the backseat with the baby. Unattended babies die every day and it’s my worst nightmare.


Infant-3, 21



Watch Ted Lasso together.


16



Soothe a newborn: Swaddle , shushing noise, swing, side/stomach position, suck on a binkie. Read The Happiest Baby on the Block by Dr. Harvey Karp (or watch the video.) It' a life-saver.


Infant



Read (or listen to) A Fragile Stone together.


15



I’m cool with “C”s. Do good work but don’t put too much pressure yourself.


14



Don’t give up on your dreams, but remember there will be plenty of times when you have to tweak them a bit…or a lot. I think of all the couples who were slated to get married in 2020. They either postponed or scrapped the big wedding for a backyard ceremony and bbq. How many brides had to *massively* shift heir vision and let go of what they assumed their wedding would look like. This happened to my friend and she cried and cried, of course. It was a big disappointment. But then she and her fiancé had the most charming backyard ceremony. It was small but so romantic.Now she says she wouldn’t change a thing about her wedding. I’ve got a silly example from my own dreams. I had long hoped to spend my 50th birthday on Maui with friends and family all staying at the Four Seasons. Fifty happened during Covid so I moved my dream celebration to sixty. And then come to find out tourism isn’t considered a good thing by locals in Hawaii, so will choose a different destination where tourism is encouraged and sustainable. I’m still dreaming my dream, even it looks different than I thought it would. All this to say, don’t lose heart when stuff happens and your plans are upended. Be honest about your disappointment about what’s been lost, but then be open to opportunities this new turn of events brings with it. There are always blessings hidden among heartbreak.


13, 17, 21



Happiness comes from giving and helping, not buying and having.


14, 19



Self-care is active not passive. (Zoning-out on the couch or sleeping all day isn’t self-care.)


13, 15



Read Harry Potter series to him / with him.


9-10



Some people have more money than sense. Just because u can afford something doesn’t mean you should buy it.


15



When you’re tired, the next best thing to sleep is a shower.


16



Talk about how choices become habits. Habits can become addictions. Describe how pathways are literally dug into the brain and it's very hard to change them once those paths are made.


13-16



Slip and Slide party!


8



Practice people skills: Firm handshake, introducing yourself, being courteous when encountering / being on receiving end of someone’s rude behavior, offering your seat (never sit while someone with gray hair, pregnant belly, any sort of injury or really anyone who is older or who works harder is standing.)


10



The bull-sh*t never ends. Dealing with the bull-sh*t IS your job. If you think you’ll ever reach a “post-bullsh*t stage in your life, you’re wrong.


12, 15, 19, 21



Just put your best foot forward and get on with it!


14, 17, 21



If they like you you’ll know. If they don’t you’ll be confused.


15, 21



Pay attention to what people do and what they say. Try to look past their appearance. This is especially true for women, who are almost always judged primarily on the way they look.


12, 15, 19



Sex isn’t something you “score.” It’s not a competition. Whether the encounter is casual or within a committed relationship it’s something that is shared.


16, 19, 20



Talk to people like they belong and are valued exactly as they are in that moment.


12-14, 21



Learn to recognize invitations from the Lord - invitations to look at beauty. Invitations for compassion, for learning and for love.


9-15



Isometrics for “punishment” (wall sits, arm lifts, planks, etc.)


5



Build a treehouse together


8



Sometimes rejection is God’s protection. If u worked hard and gave it your all and still missed the bus, that bus wasn’t yours. Read The Artist’s Way.


17