When making decisions or having a disagreement, it’s very easy to get stuck in defense of your position because we just feel so strongly about it. Without realizing it, we can discount good alternatives and or fail to see the strengths of other people’s viewpoints. As an exercise to avoid getting caught in this trap, make a habit of listing 3 reasons why you might be wrong. Stretch to accommodate the possibility that your strongly-held belief just may be wrong.


14, 18, 21



Journal! I forget who said it but it’s so true: we don’t know how we think until we see what we say. Talking into a voice memo app or writing in a journal will help you process and grow.


13, 15, 19, 21



What does it mean to grow up? Sacrifice- When you put someone else’s needs before your own. Responsibility- When you can be counted on to do what’s right and also to do what has to be done. Trustworthiness- You keep your word.Sincerity - You are true to yourself and don’t pretend in order to fit in. It’s about choices and actions and deciding what you value and then building a life around those values.


18



You’ll be finished with school soon. The most important thing I hope you learned is that there is still so much yet to learn.


21



Dream big. Work hard.


18



Pour energy into what’s right with you and see what happens.


20, 21



What I most want to teach you this year is that you can always trust me. I will always love you, take care of you and never harm you. You may not always like me, but you can always trust me.


1



Watch the local news together.


12



Define success for yourself. Be wary of becoming a corporate coal miner. Why bust your $@!#% for years and in school so you can bust your $@!#% for years in a soul-sucking job? Regardless of compensation that is not success in my book. How do you define success? For me it's "Do good. Have fun. Belong to a tribe. Meaningful work with people you love.Make enough money to pay the bills and not have to worry about the basics."


17



I love the quote “The call towards authenticity is sacred” by Paula S. Williams I think it means that a few things: Being called. We are called by something higher to grow and stretch, to evolve. That evolution is a journey that should be undertaken with humility, compassion and love. To impede one’s quest to be authentic, be it our own or another’s, is a grave injustice and should be avoided at all cost.


13, 15, 21



It’s hard to accept that the world can be so cruel and unfair, but sometimes accepting it and focusing on what part of it you CAN change is - I’ve learned - the key.


15



In social situations it's better to talk too little than too much. Don't over-share with people you're not close to.


15



1

Your job is to help your kids find themselves, not to implant an agenda of your own.


1, 5, 10, 15, 20



Things are rarely perfect, but things that are less-than-ideal aren't all bad to the same degree. Let's talk about making buckets for "not ideal but I can put up with it" and "deal-breaker." Works for all kinds of situations. Another variation of this is to grade the suckiness of a situation on a scale of 1-10. Have them decide at what point action is needed vs. just putting up with it. This one works well for hunger. Yes, you're hungry, but on a scale of 1-10, how hungry? It also works for relationships! There are plenty of things about a spouse that are less than ideal, but how many are true deal-breakers? Teach them to understand the difference.


5, 21



“I need help. But I don’t know what I need help with. Could you ask me a few questions and help me figure it out?” Keep this one in your back pocket.


5, 7, 11, 13, 16, 19, 21



Read blog post from Parent's Corner: The Letter Your Teenager Can't Write You By Gretchen Schmelzer June 23, 2015


13-17



Practice being okay with someone misunderstanding you. Not everyone is going to “get” you. That’s okay.


14, 19, 21



If someone wants to leave you, let them. Don’t waste your energy trying to prove your worth to anyone.


14, 19, 21



Use timers to motivate and structure. "Better have your jammies on and teeth brushed by the time the timer goes off!" Using a simple timer helps things not drag on and on.


2-5



Opioids are highly addictive. If possible, stay away from them entirely and definitely not for more than 2-3 days. Manage pain with NSAIDS or Tylenol.


16, 18, 21



Painful or unpleasant emotions can’t grow if you stay in the present. (Easy way to do this is to focus on your breathing.)


10, 13, 16, 21



Don’t let someone have to tell you twice that they don’t want you. Nothing good comes from hanging on after that.


15, 21



Sometimes rejection is God’s protection. If u worked hard and gave it your all and still missed the bus, that bus wasn’t yours. Read The Artist’s Way.


17



Read the instructions. Don't ask for help if you've been given instructions but haven't yet read them. RTFM. (Read the flippin' manual.)


14-21



“Be curious. Read. Use the latest tools available to you.” - Bill Gates when asked for his advice to young people in the dawn of AI era.


12, 14, 16, 18



Some people have more money than sense. Just because u can afford something doesn’t mean you should buy it.


15



Think about God as the driver of our car or the pilot of a plane- He gets us through the storm, he shows us and encourages us to enjoy the beauty of the scenery. But all the while He keeps us with him. He doesn’t cause the storms, He gets us through them. We can trust in his goodness and wisdom even when the conditions are really scary.


5, 12



Let's talk about what armor you choose. People use all kinds of props and attitudes to try to protect or soothe themselves. Often it's that armor that ends up being much worse than the scary problems they were trying to avoid in the first place. Developing a healthy set of armor is crucial. Let's talk about some healthy ways to make ourselves feel better. Reference Brene Brown wholeheartedness.


12-16



Sometimes progress is slow - Keep working. Sometimes change is swift - hang on!


16