You don’t owe me a thing. Live your life as you will. I will always love you.


18, 21



Name a few male celebrities you would feel safe with alone in a room. Keanu Reeves, Jack Black, Barack Obama, to start us off.


11, 13, 15



My ballet teacher used to punish us by making us sit on the floor and hold our arms up. It hurts! But you learn how to sit with pain. You learn how to endure and how to use your mind to make your muscles really don’t want to do.


14, 20



Violent thunderstorms can be dangerous. Avoid driving or being out in severe weather: car accidents, downed trees, high winds, lightning, flash floods, etc. are all potentially deadly. Don’t take your safety for granted. If the weather is severe, stay sheltered unless you absolutely positively have to be out and about.


12-14, 16, 21



Water park for fifth birthday


10



Respect people’s boundaries / quirks. Someone who “doesn’t fly” may have fear of enclosed spaces due to anxiety or past trauma. Someone who doesn’t drink may have had a parent who was an abusive alcoholic. Don’t laugh, question or prod. If they want to talk about it, fine. Otherwise just accept their boundaries.


15, 21



Pick an issue. One single issue, i.e. the economy or the environment or coverage of a certain event such as a crime or a sport season. Read at least one newspaper article on that topic every day. NYT, London Times etc.


14, 15, 16, 21



Check out the Jesuit Volunteer Corp. A short but deeply meaningful immersion into service, faith in action, selflessness and living on a lot less than you think you need.


19



Give books. Inscribe them. Just a line or two can turn a good book into a treasure. Great for any occasion.


17



Beautiful girls don’t exist for your pleasure. They’re not there for you. They, like you, exist to find out what it is to be alive in their body in this lifetime and to learn what makes them feel most like themself. They’re here, like you, to grow into themselves, to enjoying being alive, to marvel in creation with all its beauty and tragedy, injustices, banality and thrills. No one, friend or foe is an object for your experience


14, 16, 19, 21



A dear friend of the family used to swear by the many healing properties of Seabreeze (alcohol based astringent.) She’d prescribe it for everything from sunburn to bug bites, rashes and scrapes. it stung like heck but she was right: The stuff is a miracle! I always keep a bottle Seabreeze around and think of Mimi every time I use it.


18



Marry for character, not just chemistry.


17, 21



When you’re in a disagreement with someone or feel you’ve been wronged, it’s helpful to remember who the other person is. Are they someone of integrity? (If they’re your friend I bet they are.) Remember then, that even though they may have done something to hurt you, they were likely believed their actions were doing (or at least trying to do) the right thing. People sometimes get it wrong. Or they don’t have all the facts. Or their mind is just somewhere else. The pain you may feel from a perceived slight is probably not intentional, but even if it is, try to forgive and let it go. We’re all just doing the best we can.


16, 21



Sometimes I think the best way to take care of them is to teach them to take care of others: Littler kids, sick or disabled, those who’ve been left out.


5-7, 1Infant-12



We’re born full of love. Life is about choosing where you want to put it. -xo


15, 19, 21



Never resist a generous impulse.


9, 12, 19



“Tell me something you want to be when you grow up.”


5, 8



Do feel like you’re where you’re supposed to be?


19, 21



You can’t selectively numb feelings. The inclination to drink, use, shop, gamble, etc. is real but it’s a lie that it will make you feel better. Numbing makes this much, much worse. So feel! The good, the bad, the scary. Talk about your feelings, write about them or create something from your feelings. This is how to process in a healthy way.


16, 20



“It takes about 20 years to build a reputation and 5 minutes to ruin it. If you think about that, you’ll do things differently.” - Warren Buffett


12, 14, 16, 19, 21



On September 11th I was at work in Fairfax VA. News reports were saying a plane was headed to the Capitol, that the Whitehouse had been hit. In the immediate aftermath of a big event, news reports will be unreliable. Wait until the facts are in. Several of the nurses had husbands who worked at the Pentagon. One of the doctors was married to a U.S. Senator in her office on the Hill. It was surreal, but no one panicked. I remember we all burst into tears when my friend’s husband called saying he was safe. So relieved.


15, 17



Check your ego and question your motives. Are you in it for the right reasons or because of how it would look if you weren’t? Do you feel like you need to be a hero or the smartest one in the room? If the answer is yes I would strongly recommend that you get right with yourself.


13, 16, 19, 21



Challenge: Memorize and recite The New Colossus by Emma Lazarus.


10



Alcoholism and gambling addiction run in our family. Be very, very careful around booze and gambling.


14,16, 18, 21



“When happy, be kind. When sad, be kind. When ever…be kind.” - Cory Booker


9, 12, 15, 19, 21



If I’m lucky enough to make it to your wedding, I want to dance to Eddie Vedder’s cover of Song of Good Hope by Glen Handsard.


21



Read A Mother’s Reckoning by Sue Klebold (mother of Columbine shooter.)


12



Never make someone feel bad for liking something. Not your kids, your friends or colleagues. Joy is a beautiful thing. Cherish it in yourself and in others.


8, 9, 12



Happiness comes from giving and helping, not buying and having.


14, 19



Never say anything behind someone's back that you wouldn't say to their face.


11, 14, 18